An introvert’s guide to a night out

A night out isn’t always fun especially if you’re quiet or shy

Written by Sinéad Hunt

an-introvert’s-guide-to-a-night-out-thumbanail

Out there in the big bad world there are all sorts of social gatherings that can be hard for regular people to navigate their way through. But for anyone who is an introvert, a night out or any social event can be a nightmare. It always starts off the same your friends offer you an invite or your classmates pull you into a discussion about plans for the weekend. As the introverted crowd pleaser you are you agree, it sounds like a great night.

Of course the day of the event you chicken out and cancel at the last minute. Maybe you are one of the brave introverts that will in fact venture outside then you decide it really isn't that fun and go home early. On the other hand the mere few who make it the whole night close the door kick of their shoes and vow never to do that again.

Truth be told social events and nights out are something everyone has to do. Sure plenty of your peers enjoy it but if you don't, if you simply want to hold up under your covers at the thought of a "Big night out" then don't worry there are plenty of things you can do to get through it and have actual fun.

First things first, stick with the plan

If this means waking up at 9am checking your emails and then switching off your phone for the rest of the day just so you won't be tempted to cancel then do it! Sometimes the rapid speed at which we can communicate nowadays can be a terrible thing because it means we don't always have to stick to our word and we can make things too easy for ourselves.

Avoid thinking of the bad outcomes

During the few hours before a night out most people who feel uneasy at the thought of being sociable will start to think of all the things that could go wrong on a night out. In order to avoid this do anything except think about it, read a book, go for a walk, run an errand, watch some tv do anything to distract yourself. If you are really worried something will go wrong just stick a few plasters in your pocket and have your phone fully charged, that can cover most mishaps.

Before you head out get a friend to meet you

If possible arrange with a friend to meet you at your house, the bus stop or train station on the way to meet your other friends. This is the most helpful piece of advice out there. Once you have a friend show up at your door you won't be able to get away with any old excuse. This is especially helpful if you are going to an event where you know very few or none of the people there. The reassurance that your friend will be there with you walking in and will help break the ice with any new social circles is a huge relief to anyone who gets anxious at the though of large social gatherings.

Try to stay for a good while

Article after article can be found on the internet advising or expressing how most introverted, awkward people will have a plan of escape. This is of course a means of exiting the party or nightclub with little protest from friends. Here's the thing you can of course leave anytime you want and this really goes for any event. Consider that by leaving after an hour or two you are only doing yourself damage. Nights out are those times when you bond with peers you have never met before or would have never met otherwise.

It is a comforting truth that in the future your peers will grow out of nightclubs and bars. The outings they will invite you on will actually appeal to you and won't fill you with dread. However, for now we introverts and awkward people must stick it out until our peers adoration to thumping music and packed bars with loads of sweaty people passes.

Our work is supported by

funders-logo1
Community-foundation
funders-logo3
rethink-ireland