My experience of self-injury
One young person writes about using self-harm as a coping mechanism
This is an opinion of a young person and does not necessarily reflect the opinion of SpunOut.ie. It is one person's experience and may be different for you. If you'd like to write something for SpunOut.ie please contact firstname.lastname@example.org.
"I'm still working on myself every day but I've found different ways to express this compelling feeling"
Self-injury comes in many different forms whether it be physical or mental. Both can be equally as bad, however, mental can lead to physical often posing a more critical outcome. Because it is self-injury awareness day today I wanted to post this.
I can remember the first day I stood in my bathroom with a blade. This led to other types of self-injury. I can't explain what compelled me to do this other than the release I felt. The emotion I couldn't feel or was feeling too much of came to me in a different way, a distraction. I've never said this to anyone other than my doctor, my close friends and later, my mam. I'm still working on myself every day but I've found different ways to express this compelling feeling if it ever arises in me: drawing, sometimes on myself, painting, running, playing the piano or guitar and singing or simply getting up going for a walk or going for a swim and if I feel like company, ringing my brothers or my friends. It takes a while to see the benefits of doing this but slowly and surely, it's working for me.
That doesn't mean there isn't going to be setbacks, there always is but it becomes easier to deal with them. For anyone who has or is ever thinking of hurting themselves I hope you can take something from this. There's other ways to show how you're feeling and there's other ways to cope. You are special and you are worth so much so please don't try to tell yourself otherwise.