When friendship ends
Losing a friend can be very stressful.
This is an opinion of a young person and does not necessarily reflect the opinion of SpunOut.ie. It is one person's experience and may be different for you. If you'd like to write something for SpunOut.ie please contact firstname.lastname@example.org.
""I kept trying to call him, but eventually found my dignity. I realised that it wasn't anything I had done.""
It might seem like the worst thing in the world: losing a friend. But I promise you time is a great healer; things will get better. Losing a friend can be very stressful especially if you're not sure why it's happening.
There may be reasons you will never know but you just have to remember that if you were friends once, then it couldn't have been anything to do with who you are. There may have been something that you have done or said that has hurt your friend without you realising it. Or maybe it could be someone else who is getting in the way of your friendship. Either way don't be too worried as everything happens for a reason. If you are meant to be friends again then you will be. If not then you won't. It might be hard but believe me you will get over it.
On the other hand it might be you who is causing the falling out. Your friend has possibly said or done something that you don't like. Don't take it to heart, ask them to explain what they meant or why they did it. I am sure there is a perfectly innocent reason behind it. You have to remember that true friends are hard to come by. A true friend will always be there for you and vice versa even though you fight continuously.
I lost my best friend of three years last year. He suddenly decided that I wasn't good enough to be his friend. I don't know the reason why he stopped talking to me and I'm guessing I never will. It cut me really deep losing him especially as I was going through a really rough time at home and he knew that. I cried my eyes out for days and blamed myself. I kept trying to call him, but eventually found my dignity. I realised that it wasn't anything I had done. It was him who had the problem not me. If he didn't want me in his life then fair enough; I would go back to the way my life was before him.
I started to hang around with other friends, friends I had neglected while with him. I soon realised that these were my true friends. They were here to catch me now that I had fallen. Even though I had let them down they stood by me, they protected me, they rebuilt me. I now know that a true friend is worth more than anything and I will never turn my back on any of my friends again, I will be there to catch them.
Losing friends is part of life. Children can list off more than 20 friends. As you reach your teens you start to develop more intense friendships and let go of some of your old friends.
Someone once said to me, “If you can count your friends on more than one hand you are truly blessed”. Even if you have one good friend count yourself lucky as many people go through life without anyone.