In today’s world the stigma surrounding the LBGTI+ community and coming out as a member of that community is lessening every day. In the world of sports, where athletes, particularly male, are seen as tough, masculine and fearless, coming out can be a very daunting thing to do. However more and more sports stars, current and former, are coming out as gay and encouraging others, both athletes and non-athletes to do the same. The more people begin to accept themselves for who they are, the more others learn to accept them and further reduces the stigma surrounding the issue.

Here are 5 top sports stars who have openly come out as a member of the LGBTi+ community.

Donal Óg Cusack 

Donal Óg Cusack is a former Cork Hurler and hurling coach. He is widely regarded as one of the best goalkeepers of his generation. Born in Cloyne, Co. Cork, in 1977, Donal was born into a strong hurling family. He progressed quickly through the ranks of the Cork hurling team and won 5 Munster titles, 3 All-Irelands and 2 All Stars.

In an interview with the Irish Mail on Sunday in 2009, in the lead up to the release of his autobiograghy, Come What May, Cusack came out as gay. In the book he writes:

‘I know I am different but just in this way. Whatever you may feel about me or who I am, I've always been at peace with it.’

Gareth Thomas 

Gareth Thomas is a retired Welsh rugby player. Born in Sarn, Wales, in 1974. He appeared on the Welsh International rugby scene in 1995 with his debut coming against Japan. Over the next 12 years he would go to make 100 appearances for the Welsh team, be selected for the 2005 Lions tour and the 2008 Barbarians tour.

In 2001, Thomas married Jenna Thomas. They filed for divorce in 2007 and it was finalised in 2009. Later that year Thomas came out as gay. This made him the first openly gay rugby union to play the sport professionally. He said in an interview with the Daily Mail: ‘I don't want to be known as a gay rugby player. I am a rugby player, first and foremost I am a man’

Thomas has said that he hopes the fact he has come out shall encourage more rugby players to accept themselves and follow in his footsteps.

David Marquette Kopay

Kopay was one of the first professional athletes to come out as gay. Born in 1942, he was a running back in the NFL for 8 years. He attended Notre Dame High School in California. His biography, The David Kopay Story, became a bestseller when it was released in 1977. In 1986 he revealed he had a brief affair with Jerry Smith, also an NFL player, who died that year of AIDS-related complications without having ever came out as gay.

Kopay joined the Federation of Gay games as a Gay Games Ambassador and came to the Gay Games VII in 2006 and was an announcer in the opening ceremony.

Valerie Mulcahy 

Valerie Mulcahy is a Gaelic footballer who played inter county football with Cork. She retired from football in 2016. Over her career she won 10 All-Ireland titles, 9 Division 1 titles and much more. In 2015 she became the first female star of the GAA to speak out about her sexuality. She says in a documentary on RTE about Donal Óg Cusack that when she was younger she didn’t want to be gay, but she learned to accept herself for who she was.

She is also a secondary school teacher and is an executive of the Ladies Gaelic Players Association.

Thomas Hitzlsperger

Hitzlsperger was born in 1982, in Munich, Germany. He was a professional footballer who played for Premier League teams such as Aston Villa, West Ham and Everton, and the German National team.

In 2007 he split from his girlfriend of eight years, a month before they were due to get married. On January 8th, 2014, he came out as gay. He said he had only discovered sexuality in recent years.

Over the course of his career, Hitzlsperger won the Bundesliga in 2007 with VfB Stuttgart and racked up 52 caps for the German National team, appearing at the 2006 World Cup and the 2008 European Championships. In 2013 he announced his retirement after a string of injuries.

As I arrive at the end of my fourth year I secondary school, the time has come where I am looking back and asking myself ‘was I right to choose to do an extra year in school?’. The fact of the matter is, it comes down to each person individually. Personally I feel my TY experience was not what it could have been, due to a few different things, but I also know people in my class that have loved it. The moral of the story is that TY is not for everyone, so it is important to weigh up the pros and cons and see would you be suited to it before jumping into an extra year in school.

Pros of Transition Year

Opportunity to mature

TY can really give students the time, space and environment to mature and grow, which can be really helpful for the following two years where maturity is definitely essential to success

Work experience

This is an extremely valuable part of TY as it shows young people the reality of the working world. It also can really help a student decide what they want, or do not want to do in college and adult life.

Different opportunities

Many opportunities may present themselves in TY that may not have arisen had you gone straight to fifth year. For example in my school we had a musical and a ski-trip and I can safely say these were the two highlights of the year.

Get to know new people

It sound like a bit of a cliché that you hear from teachers all the time, but TY really does help you expand your circle of friend through working with them on projects, staying in a room with them on overnight trips and being mixed into new classes with them.

Trips

You get the opportunity to go on many fun trips in TY such as adventure centres and perhaps abroad if your school facilitates this. Also if you take part in Gaisce you will go on a 25km walk which sound daunting but is thoroughly enjoyable.

Project work

A lot of the work in Transition year is project based. Teachers are not hounding you every class to hand up work, it all gets handed up in one at the end. This is very good preparation for college and the adult working life.

Cons of Transition Year

Extra year in school

If you are the kind of person who really just hates school and can’t wait to get out into the real world, then you won’t want to willingly choose to spend another year in the place you’re dying to get out of. If you know for sure what you want to when you leave school, why hang around? The flip side of this is you may be very young graduating.

Get lazy

In TY you receive little to no homework every night and rarely get tests in class. There are no monthly tests, Christmas or summer exams. The opposite can be said for fifth year. Teachers will pile on the homework and a student coming from TY will really be thrown in the deep end. Some people can handle this and are refreshed and ready to hit the books but some people may be overwhelmed by it all and not be able to cope, whereas people who skip TY will be used to the workload from the Junior Cert.

Forget things

You know when you go back to school after the summer holidays and it feels like everything has just slowly leaked out over the course of the three months? Try that after a year of not doing particularly exerting classwork, no homework, no study and exams.

So to conclude, there are many pro’s and con’s of doing Transition year. Overall I feel it all comes down to each individual person and how they are suited to it, and how the school runs the programme. If you do choose to do TY, the advice I would give is to get involved in everything that comes your way and don’t let yourself fall behind on work (it will come back to bite you). In the end it will be what you make of it.

Lucena Clinic is hosting a consultation event. The organisers want to bring together children, young people and parents, who attend the Lucena Clinic service or have attended in the past to discuss important questions such as:

This event will be led by experts Julie Repper and Miles Rinaldi from ImROC who will facilitate groups to talk about strengths and weakness of the mental health services for children and young people and how to improve things. A group of current staff from Lucena and staff from other children’s services including HSE & Jigsaw will also attend the consultation. 

Ideas and recommendations expressed on the day will be included in a report for the HSE, which could help to improve the service available for young people.

Who?

Children, Young People, Carers, Parents & Staff

What?

Consultation event about Lucena Clinic Child and Adolescent Mental Health Service.     

Why?

Your chance to be heard and make a difference.

Where and when?

Thursday the 4th of May 2pm – 4pm

The Royal Marine Hotel, Dun Laoghaire

It’s also OK to just turn up on the day!

For more information contact Triona Byrne or Kevin Madigan at 01-4923596 or mail [email protected] or [email protected]

Everyone knows the benefits of the European Union which I do not have to go into in detail. What I can tell you however is that here and there I come across people who take those benefits for granted. They complain that their country has lost its sovereignty or cannot govern itself as it would wish to; that there is some sort of unfairness, maybe in monetary policy or the refugee situation.

Being born in Armenia and just recently becoming an EU citizen I could not fulfil my dream of work and travel across Europe when studying at university. Back in those days I could not go and visit my dream country, Ireland, the country with its world-famous Guinness, beautiful music and famous friendliness of its people. There is that restriction for Non-EU citizens called the Schengen Agreement, the impact of which I felt the most.

Earlier in 2017 I visited Ireland for the first time and was not disappointed. I fell in love from the first time I touched Irish ground. Every detail when talking to people, breathing in their way of living and that warmth and kindness is second to none. I could not feel more happy and grateful about the European Union`s idea of free movement of people, goods and capital.

Having that opportunity to culturally exchange with so many countries and get to know the diverse and unique history of each one of them makes me feel free and happy. Moreover, I strongly believe that only a united European Union can ensure safety in times of terrorism and prosperity in a hard-contested global economy.

Let us continue working on a democratic and strong EU so our descendants will continue benefiting from it the way we do now. It is highly important, especially in times of Brexit.

As I, like many people I know, suffer from depression, I thought it would be an interesting thing to discuss as I’ve never really written about it. I've never been diagnosed with depression, but over the years I've realised that a lot of what I think or feel isn't healthy. Also, maybe this a shock to some people, but it never came up in conversation. Nobody really asks "How are you?", unless the reply they want is "grand".

Even though depression is a common thing for people today, and probably many generations before, it's still not given the attention it should be. With issues like this, people tend to shy away from talking about it. People are ashamed, which I find is unfortunate. People say 'that’s sad' a lot which is a very discouraging word, preventing people from talking about how they’re feeling. I honestly think people that use this word are sad themselves. Using a word like this to put down people who have the courage to open up is a very cowardly thing. Even though I suffer from this, as I do many other things, I still wonder how everyone else deals with theirs. I'm just very lucky I learned to use mine as motivation. I'm not trying to glamorise being mentally ill. It can be a horrible thing. I just don't think I'd be where I am today without it. It became the thing that drove me to open mics and live music nights almost every night, which helped me meet amazing people and make great contacts! The only problem was that after the fun was over, it was always the monster waiting for me when I got home.

For people who don't believe in mental illnesses, or wonder what it feels like, depression alone is extremely draining and demotivating. It's like the mind and body are completely separate. I could wake up one morning and decide I want to go to the gym early, but I just can't get up because the part of my brain, that moves my body I suppose just won't function. It feels like there's something really heavy in my chest just keeping me down. It takes hours until eventually I'm able to move. Although I'm up and moving, this 'heavy heart' feeling tends to come back very randomly. I could be in town or with friends, having a great day and this feeling comes back and I just feel dragged down, I need to go home and just collapse on the couch for hours. Just lying there in silence, sometimes even crying as I just feel like I’m trapped in hopelessness. Like I’ve fallen into a hole in the timeline of my life and I’m stuck there. Depression also kills your sex drive too. I could be talking to a girl I’m really into and then just lose interest. This is one of the reasons why I’ve never been keen on alcohol. It would become too easy to get addicted. “A few drinks just to loosen up” could turn into “I can’t stop drinking, otherwise I’ll just feel like shit!”

In conversation I have no filter. In the past I've mentioned the word depression; this caused the person I was talking to, to reply "Are you depressed?". Not in a way that they're suddenly concerned about me, but in a shocked way. I see posts on Facebook telling people they need to open up like it’s as easy as reading a book. It’s not that simple. From personal experience, you’ll more than likely end up being cut off and alienated for it. There have been months when I’ve just felt completely deflated and all I can talk about is everything that’s going wrong because my mindset has become so negative. I’ve had to learn to talk to people less during these times, otherwise everyone will just think I’m a buzzkill and they’ll stop talking to me. I think the best way to help somebody like this is to just listen. You don’t need any solutions or magic advice, just let them open up. It’s understandable, that you don’t want someone in your life who’s negative all the time but if you help them see the positive, it’s a lot better than making them feel like they’re on their own. Invite them to places instead of being caught up in your own bubble of happiness.

I’m not saying you need to befriend everybody that drags a dark cloud around with them 24/7, there’s a big difference between people who are depressed and someone who just loves being miserable. Depressed people try to keep the mood lit and have a great sense of humor. They’re people you love being around, but tend to have the odd mood swing or can be a bit off. The people who are always up for having fun because their house is wedged with their demons and they have to get out for a while.

I've had several people open up to me about their depression, suicidal thoughts, self harming and even abusive pasts. This is mainly due to my 'interview like' way of conversing. It doesn't take long to feel comfortable talking to me and I just listen. Also, I've spent a lot of time around drunk people so them being drunk had an effect on that too, although, not all of them were drunk. If you ever find yourself in this position, just stay calm. Even if you want to get out of it, just remain listening for as long as you can, instead of having a “I don’t care” attitude. I’ve listened to people just open up and talk for hours. I’d never expect anyone else to do that, and you don’t have to be amazing at handling these situations, but even if you give them 30 or 40 minutes of your time, it’ll make a world of difference. The fact that they feel comfortable saying this stuff to you is enough.

Space has always fascinated me. The vast emptiness in which we spin through blackness for eternity. It’s eerily beautiful and frightening. You may remember from school that we orbit around the Sun as does the, ahem dwarf-planet Pluto (this is a touchy subject). The Earth is the third planet from the Sun and Pluto is the furthest, decently large, celestial body from the Sun. So, if you were trying to send a rocket to hit the Sun, you would imagine that it would be easier to do so from Earth, seeing as we are so much closer.

If I told that it was more difficult to send a rocket from Earth and hit the sun than to send a rocket from Pluto and hit the sun, you probably wouldn’t believe me. You would immediately tell me that I was being ridiculous, that it didn’t make sense at all and couldn’t possibly be true. However, it is indeed one hundred percent true. It’s more difficult to hit the sun from planets which orbit nearer the sun. We on Earth orbit the sun at around 30km/s. For us to be able to hit the sun with our rocket, it would need to first counteract that lateral velocity before we’d have any chance of succeeding. Compare this to Pluto’s velocity of 5km/s and you see that it’s surprisingly easier from afar. Your likely reaction of doubt is good. It’s a counterintuitive statement. It’s designed to catch you out. Your reaction is that of critical thinking.

Critical thinking is defined as objective analysis and evaluation of an issue in order to form an opinion. What does this mean? It means gathering all relevant information and understanding an issue or topic to the point where you can form an opinion on it. This is an important skill to have in your life. As someone who has a love for and studies science, I strive to be reasonably critical of any new information I come across. It’s not a life skill that’s intrinsic to us, it’s a learned skill, through continued thinking, reflection, information gathering and forming your own opinion. In modern times, data, information and statistics are used quite liberally though avenues such as Facebook, Twitter and even news sources, which we think to be reputable. Often however, when you further examine this information you find that it’s either incorrect, misinterpreted or misrepresented.

So, how do we improve our capacity to apply logic and think critically of things?

Firstly, question everything! When we are young (and your parents will attest to this) you asked constant questions. Children are naturally curious about the world around them. They want to know more and more and are rarely satisfied with your first answer. They will continue to dig with their “whys” and “hows.” Somewhere along the way we lose this originally intrinsic curiosity. You should ask questions, you should want to find out information.

Secondly, following on from the first, ask the opinions of people on a topic. I am no expert on anything. Therefore, when I need to find out something, I’ll often turn to my peers first. Be it my friends, my lecturers, my coaches – ask someone who may have the knowledge. You should never be afraid of not knowing. There is no such thing as a stupid question. The only stupid question is the unasked one.

Thirdly, become aware of your own mental processes. This can be a bit strange when you first become aware of it but is one of the most important things you can do. We all have certain biases. That’s ok! It’s part of our individuality. The problems arise when our bias clouds our judgement and decision making. Being self-critical is important and can help you to see other viewpoints and opinions. Skills like this are important for diplomatic and fair arguments. As well as that, exploring others viewpoints can help you to make much more informed decisions.

Finally, review the existing information with a fine-tooth comb. You should ask questions like, “Who gathered the information?”, “Why was the information collected?”, “How was the survey etc conducted?”. You should evaluate new information critically to prevent reaching an incorrect conclusion.  Imagine you see a new report that a new extra sugary cereal has great health benefits. However, when we examine who the survey was conducted by, we see it was funded by the cereal company itself. Therefore, you should have some healthy scepticism when it comes to the report.

In conclusion, critical thinking is a skill I wish was instilled in every one of us from birth. Unfortunately, it’s not and we must learn through thinking, asking questions and reflection. We should all try and improve our skills in this area which can in turn help us become better people. From science, to business, to politics, everyone should review all the information they come across and it’s always important to remember that others are not infallible. A statement I love is an old Irish saying. It says, “Doras feasa fiafraí” which means, “The door to wisdom is to ask questions.” Stay curious and stay critical.

I know what you’re thinking, scouts that’s the weird one with a funny scarf thing, right? Wrong (okay well a little bit right, but there is more to it than that). The media posts countless images of us hiking up mountains and rowing boats, less of us drinking tea and singing songs! If anyone watched the movie Up, you may have been led to believe that all scouts live for collecting badges. On the contrary I think I have tried to put new badges onto my uniform once and even at that it was with wonderweb, and they fell off in the wash. I love the outdoors, the beach is my favourite place in the world and nothing makes me happier than sleeping in a tent, but I’m no Bear Grylls and that’s okay. I’ve been a sea scout for over 10 years now, and sometimes I struggle tying my shoelaces never mind knots! The best thing about scouting is that there’s a place for everyone regardless.

I remember my mam asking what my favourite thing about camping was when I was 9 years old. “Aw definitely dinner time!” I beamed. She gave me that look, you know the I love you but you’re a weirdo, that one. We’d eaten those tinned meatballs with soggy pasta one too many times, the food was far from spectacular. Not surprisingly, the dinner wasn’t really my favourite thing about dinner time, it was the people who ate it with me. There was something so special about sitting with 20 other 9 year olds, laughing over an old joke book someone had got for Christmas, and eating our soggy pasta. It was family. The people will always be my favourite aspect of scouting, no matter what we’re eating.

The founder of scouting, Sir Baden Powell said “The most worth-while thing is to try to put happiness into the lives of others”. I am now in ventures (15 to 18 year olds), and we are very much in charge of our programme and what we do. Every winter we try to do something to help the homeless community in our town, from food appeals to dignity packs. We also help out with the younger sections and fundraise for the RNLI. We are given the freedom and space to do good and make change if we so wish. Scouting has provided me and thousands of others with the opportunity to make and be change. This would not be possible without our scouters, they really are in one in a million! Scouting is an organisation like no other in that it authentically supports young people to do what they want and care about. So, if it’s camping in Galway on your own, fundraising for a charity or just spending a whole meeting drinking cups of tea, it is up to you!

Like toilets are perfect breeding grounds to germs, scouting is this to friendship. I’ve never been sure why, but scouts just seems to make forging friendships so easy. People you may have never spoke to, become close friends. Take me (an outspoken atheist), and my friend (an altar boy). We are as different as we sound and yet we still manage to get on somehow! On one of the hardest days of my life, I saw two girls standing outside my mam’s funeral in full scout uniform. They smiled at me, in a way that made me realise they’d be there. Before this day, we weren’t friends to say the least, now they’re two of my best! Scouting is about loyalty and sticking together. Scouts has taught me how to make lifelong friends in a weekend. From Cork to France we’re all over the world! Scouting friendships are unique to any other. I could wear a full face of makeup, or my hair in a messy bun with no eyebrows drawn on, down to scouts and I would get the same reaction. It is the only community that I’ve ever been a part of where you will be judged on how you treat others and what you do rather than how you look and what you wear. As I’ve said there are so many different characters in scouting and that is because you are given the freedom to be whoever it is that you are. It’s as if as soon as you put on your necko you get a whole new attitude too. So what, if that guy wants to wear a onesie for the whole camp, you like ancient Russian literature? Oh that’s cool. In scouts doing whatever it is that makes you happy is totally acceptable. Scouting is about being yourself and not judging others for doing the same.

My life would be a very different place without scouting, not because I’ve hiked up mountains or sailed in lakes but because of who was there with me. It has taught me countless lessons about first aid and sea safety but the most important life skill I’ve ever learnt is to love and to be loved. In the words of Baden Powell “Try leave this world a little better than you found it.” I hope we all get the opportunity to achieve this.

If you wish to get involved, it’s never too late, visit scouts.ie and go onto group locator to find your nearest group!

There’s also a scouting blog, where other young people have submitted some beautiful things. Have a look!

 

Arklow is like most small Irish towns, grey and gloomy when it rains, occasionally pretty when it’s sunny and not much else happening. In almost 15 years of living there through rainy and sunny days, I had never really heard about positive mental health. See, again like most other Irish towns, mental health is often viewed as something dark and scary that’s whispered about in S.P.H.E classes.

Fortunately, this was about to change. Last Summer, a few of my friends and I went to a workshop hosted by Be Well Bray. We weren’t exactly sure what we were in for, but we hadn’t anything to lose and there’s a strong possibility it was one of Arklow’s rainy days plus there was a free lunch! The first thing they told us was that we all have mental health, just like physical health. It seems like quite a simple statement but I had never thought of it like that before, it blew my mind. I learnt loads that day and the discussion got me hooked. How could I have believed that something so normal and even positive was inherently bad and secretive? How can we change how others view and look after their mental health?

After this workshop, Be Well Bray, invited us to get involved and encouraged us to start our very own Be Well Arklow. As I said with not much else going on in our town and little knowledge of positive mental health, we decided that this group was what we needed, and by the looks of it we were going to start it. Our first meeting was held in our local scout hall, there was about eight of us there and we had little idea about what to do – obviously, we turned to google.

Still struck by the idea that like we all had physical health we also all had mental health, we decided to search both topics. When we googled physical health the first pages to come up were all about keeping fit and eating well. On the contrary, when we googled mental health, links for crisis situations came up along with lists of mental illnesses. We were immediately disappointed, it wasn’t just our town that seemed to view mental health as a negative thing it seemed to be the whole world. Still with little idea of what we could do, we decided to brainstorm and try figure out what we wanted to do. And with that came our mission statement “We aim to promote a more positive and practical approach to mental health among the youth community in our area.”

The other Be Well groups were a big inspiration for us and that is where we found out about the five a day! We all agreed this concept would be one of our core messages. If you can eat five pieces of fruit and do 40 minutes of exercise to keep physically fit, what can you do to stay mentally fit?

Connect

Have a chat with a friend, ring your auntie, just try and find some time once a day to hang out with other people.

Contribute

Whatever contributing means to you, if it’s walking your nannie’s dog or coaching soccer, find something that gets you involved.

Stay Healthy

Your physical and mental health are equally important to each other. Try to get at least 8 hours of sleep a night, and do some exercise.

Accept

Accept yourself, your life, and your situations. Learn to love yourself.

Be aware of your thoughts

Understand and listen to what’s going on in your head. Realise that you’re separate from your thoughts.

Be Well Week

Arklow already has a youth mental health week, but unfortunately there are no young people involved in the planning of this event and sometimes it can focus solely on crisis situations. Although we acknowledge that awareness about mental illnesses and how to get help is vital, however it is not what Be Well specialises in. Still with our aim to promote mental health as something positive and even fun, we started planning our own events with the help of Be Well Bray. On October 10th, 2016, we had the launch of “Be Well Week” in our youth centre.

A local artist and designer Conso, gave an inspirational talk about being open about mental health and the power of resilience. We had young local musicians perform, a bit of a laugh and food! We also put out conversation cards encouraging people to talk about mental health and what it means to them. On Wednesday, we had led mindfulness and a campfire on the beach. Friday was pizza and discussion night, with walking debates, wall thoughts and of course pizza. On Saturday morning, we had yoga and positive quotes.

In the evening with our activities coming to a close, we got local band Small Town Crisis to play at the skate park. As it started to lash and we’d to try transport all the gear to the youth centre, we all learnt a big lesson about community and resilience. Overall the week was a big success and we have started planning more events to try and change how people view mental health.

Starting Be Well in our town has most definitely changed our perspective on mental health and we hope to change as many young people’s perspective as we can. It would not have been possible without the teamwork and compassion of the ever-growing group. I will be forever grateful for the fellow Be Weller’s friendship, love and dedication. Also to the youth workers who worked so hard for us and by our side. If you are interested in getting involved or have any questions, you can find us on Facebook at “Be Well Arklow.”

“Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world, indeed it’s the only that ever has.”– Margaret Mead

Every morning, I open Twitter – I love Twitter, for news, thoughts, opinions and pictures of cats. But lately, I’ve noticed a rather worrying trend – my female followers are dropping like flies in the face of online misogyny. Men, armed with anonymous handles and cartoon profile photos, are the new face of bullying, and it’s smart, funny women with opinions that are the victims.

Tara Flynn, comedian and abortion rights activist, logged off Twitter after receiving hate left, right and centre for her views. Countless other women whose opinions I’ve grown to love have given up, tired of countering abuse on Twitter with a block, a mute, a report.

I’m tired of it. Isn’t it silly to be afraid to share your views on Twitter, a space built for sharing opinion?

While International Women’s Day is a global event, encompassing issues as wide and as varied as you can imagine, this issue is the one at the forefront of my mind this March 8th – feminist beliefs are not in contest with one another, of course, but they say write what you know.

One thing I know is Twitter, and the crap thrown at women there. But I’m Irish, too, so I have to look beyond my phone screen on this one.

In Ireland, what do we know as women? What is life as an Irish woman?

We know that we do not control our own bodies.

We know that if we are raped, the attacker has such a slim chance of conviction that to report can feel almost pointless.

We know Article 41.2 of the Constitution, which states that women belong in the home, not the workforce.

We know that sex workers’ lives are constantly under threat under our current laws.

We know that we, the 3 million-odd women on the island of Ireland, are alone. We know that much as we love to paint a facade of equality, misogyny lurks under the surface. It lurks online, in “locker room talk”, in a chorus of “well, she was asking for it”. Behind every corner is someone who thinks less of you – consciously or unconsciously – because of your gender. We know that men like Chris Brown, like Woody Allen, like the President of the United States, can climb the bodies of the women they’ve broken, and feel nothing but pride.

This International Women’s Day, we don’t feel safe. I don’t feel safe. I feel alone and powerless against a state that trapped women in homes and hid their babies underground, a state that wants me to keep my body to myself, and to export the problem if I am unfortunate enough to fall pregnant.

For women, this year, is not safe. The so-called bastions of gender equality in the Western world are falling behind, and in Ireland, it’s hard to see women as equal to men when the foundations of our state trap us: between the kitchen and the plane to England.

So.

What can women do?

On March 8th, the world celebrates women – in Italy, museums with exhibits by women are free, and no doubt celebrities will speak out against the injustices faced by women around the world. But something different is happening this year – in the United States, the organiser’s of January’s Women’s March are organising an all-out strike – “a day without a woman” – to highlight the injustices faced in the US, particularly under Trump. 

Do you need to do these things to take part in International Women’s Day? Of course not – but remember that we are living in a different climate, one where women’s place is – all too suddenly – up for debate. This International Women’s Day, it’s time to embrace change, look forward and stop letting the Trumps and the Twitter trolls think they’re winning. To borrow from a sign spotted at the Women’s March: this International Women’s Day, a woman’s place is in the resistance.

I will begin by writing a few home truths regarding OCD, more importantly what OCD is not. OCD is not someone who likes their desk a certain way, or someone who has a clean house or all their books in alphabetical order on the book shelf. OCD is much more complicated and debilitating than that, believe me I know.

I am part of various online support groups for people affected by this complicated disorder, and if you see the devastation this illness causes you may think twice about making a joke of it.

I will begin at my earliest memory of having what I now know as OCD, it was around the ages of 8/9 perhaps younger. I was an obsessive hand washer, often to the point where they would bleed, my hands were often red raw and cracked from the handwashing on a daily basis. I can remember washing them, then getting the thought ‘’they are not clean enough’’ so I would clean again and again, obviously my fears at the time were contamination, germs, diseases etc. As well as hand washing I was a checker, or to be more specific constantly checking to see if I had left the cooker on or light switches etc. These daily tasks were time consuming, needless and pretty much caused severe anxiety, sleepless nights, worry and untold amounts of problems.

My fears of germs got so severe I began refusing to use the toilet, mainly so I would not have to go through my ritualistic hand washing regime, sadly though this only led to more problems down the line. At this young age my ‘’obsessions’’ which is OCD terms for ‘’thoughts’’ surrounded the themes of harm, contamination, cleanliness, order and checking, all common OCD afflictions. Looking back now I was a chronic worrier, and I mean chronic, almost every single thought that entered my head as a kid was analysed over and over, what did it mean, where did it come from. I somehow always felt responsible for the safety of others, one particular thought which caused me anxiety was the thought my mam would be killed in a car crash.

Obsessive thoughts

For someone so young it’s a pretty rough worry, to alleviate the anxiety the thought caused I would have to repeat a mantra over and over again to make sure the thought was ‘’gone’’. Usually it was something like ‘’I do not want this to happen’’ or ‘’ I didn’t mean to have the thought’’ I now realise all of that was needless and time consuming for the thoughts were not the problem, my reaction to the thought was the problem, something I have now been treated for thankfully. My OCD also took on the role of praying for forgiveness for having such bad thoughts, or for having bad thoughts in Church or School. Pretty much every night when I was young I would keep repeating my mantra, ‘’I did not mean to have the thought’’.

Those are my earliest memories of my OCD. As I went into my teenage years my OCD decided to abandon all the hand washing, checking, mantras and cleaning obsessions and begin to attack my sexual identity, something I am still not sure of to this day. This in my opinion is where OCD needs to be understood. Yes I was someone who cleaned a lot and wash my hands obsessively, but  OCD  is much more than that. Sexually intrusive thoughts is another common theme of OCD, around 6% of sufferers have sexual thoughts. These are intrusive thoughts that you may be gay or be a child abuser. Both are equally horrendous for the sufferer. I began my battle with homosexual OCD or HOCD when I was around 13/14/15.

I somehow believed I was gay;  (I am not nor never was) every single male person I saw I asked myself am I attracted to them, or have I sexual feelings for them? The more I checked the more certain I was that I was gay. I kept asking for reassurance that I was not gay or going completely mad. Sadly this only fuelled the problem. Every young person experiences sexually intrusive thoughts, be it bad or good, they do not obsess over them, they let them come and go, people with OCD cannot, thus OCD is known as the doubting disease.

Purely Obsessional OCD

My OCD changed themes through the years, which is quiet common, from the early days of hand washing to sexual obsessions, I have had it all but the one which terrified me the most was the horrific fear I could somehow be a child abuser. People with OCD I must point out are NOT dangerous; they are generally morally good people. This particular obsession was the most harrowing and disturbing, the idea of being someone like this was just too risky to shake off, I needed absolute certainty that I was not, I constantly questioned every single thought, my mind could never be certain, in response I spent hours, days and eventually years mentally ruminating.

I was suffering from a form of OCD called purely obsessional OCD or Pure O; this means basically you have an obsession (i.e. fears of being a child abuser) but no noticeable compulsions. So this made it very difficult for anyone to know of its severity. It was all mental, my mind was awash with horrendous sexual and violent intrusive thoughts daily, and it was never ending. After years of this horrific obsession, I  came to a conclusion, I had to be stopped, I needed to kill myself, the fear was too great, too big and if there was any doubt I could commit such horrendous acts I must be stopped.

Eventually holding in the fear was too great, so I decided suicide was the only option, but after one failed bid I had to confide in someone, I went to my GP certain I was heading away to be locked up, and after months of A and E visits, I was finally assessed by a Mental Health team who finally diagnosed me with OCD, a welcome relief, my recovery began in earnest.

Today I am a hell of a lot better, I have not been cured of OCD but with medication and therapy I can now move on in life to a better future. OCD is not a death sentence, it is a mental health condition that is nothing to be ashamed of, and it is treatable. As I said it is not just about cleaning or having things organised, it is much more severe than that.

That is my battle, thank you for reading.

For Many people, especially early teens, appearance is becoming increasingly important, and is becoming closely more linked with self-esteem. I think that the access to social media and the internet at such a young age although has its benefits is very damaging to a person’s self-esteem.

As a young person living in Ireland I think there is quite a lot of pressure to do ‘what everyone else is doing’ and to stick to the ‘norm’ , is social media to blame for this?

I think that social media has definitely made the fear of being judged much greater than before, now the amount of likes and comments someone gets on social media are becoming increasingly important especially to young people. Being accepted by peers is way more important to young people over self-acceptance.

People are being judged on their personality by the amount of likes on their most recent profile picture. I think that blaming the likes of Kylie Jenner and other social figures for the amount of low self-esteem is way easier than actually seeing that it’s just ordinary people doing the same amount of damage.

Celebrities have set unrealistic goals for people and have made it harder to self-accept yourself and have given people unrealistic expectations in relation to looks.

But I don’t think it’s fair to blame social media for all the self-esteem issues in young people today. Caring about your appearance isn’t the problem, it’s when people let it take over their lives and start to think that everything’s about looks over personality. I think there is an unnecessary amount of pressure on people to always look their best, especially on teenage girls. There are 12 year old girls going to socials in the local GAA club and spending €30 to get their makeup professionally done. And when girls start doing this it makes the other girls feel inferior, leading to cliques and groups.

Girls are raised to see each other as competitors but not in a way that’s beneficial like for jobs or accomplishments but in the competition for men. I know this isn’t the case for all girls and I also know that makeup isn’t just worn to impress men, but I do think it has a huge part to play in the low self-esteem issues in young women. I think that young girls seek the attention and acceptance from the opposite sex by posting pictures and looking for likes.

From a young age we’re read books and watch movies about the handsome prince saving the beautiful princess, so from a young age the idea of women needing men is planted in our heads. But recently Disney have brought out new movies expressing that women don’t necessarily need men for example Frozen, which I think is really important for young girls to start seeing.

The unrealistic appearance of a woman having; perfect skin, tiny waists, perfect breasts, and perfect bum, all with a weight of under 60kg, are unrealistic images of beauty, physically impossible for many of us. The same thing applies to the ripped abs, chiseled jaw for men shown through famous sportsmen and male fitness models, which for many is impossible to achieve without illegal steroids.

Yet we are told that these unattainable bodies are normal, desirable, and achievable. When we don’t we develop a strong sense of dissatisfaction and low self-esteem. And this can lead to the use of illegal steroids, plastic surgery etc.  

In conclusion, I think as a teenager in 2017, there is a lot of pressure on appearance, and while I think the media plays a part in this I don’t think it’s the only cause, I think more people need to realise that appearances don’t last forever and there are much more important things to think about.

The internet is such a good thing and our generation has grown up with the best resources yet, there is tonnes of information out there that we can now access with the click of a button. But that said we must be careful how we use it, and the amount of information we give out. As too much information can attract unwanted attention and spam, cyber bulling etc. But there are ways to keep our experience as safe as possible by ‘uniting to create a better internet’ which is what Safer Internet Day is all about.

These are all things that will make the internet safer by uniting but there are many things that are a lot more personal and private but for keeping your internet experience safe are very important.

These are all things that will make the internet safer by uniting but there are many things that are a lot more personal and private but for keeping your internet experience safe are very important. 

These are things such as…

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