The internet is such a good thing and our generation has grown up with the best resources yet, there is tonnes of information out there that we can now access with the click of a button. But that said we must be careful how we use it, and the amount of information we give out. As too much information can attract unwanted attention and spam, cyber bulling etc. But there are ways to keep our experience as safe as possible by ‘uniting to create a better internet’ which is what Safer Internet Day is all about.

These are all things that will make the internet safer by uniting but there are many things that are a lot more personal and private but for keeping your internet experience safe are very important.

These are all things that will make the internet safer by uniting but there are many things that are a lot more personal and private but for keeping your internet experience safe are very important. 

These are things such as…

Énouement – The bittersweetness of having arrived in the future, seeing how things turn out, but not being able to tell your past self.

I didn’t know there was a word for this. It’s a feeling I experience every day that I thought could not be defined. I want to go back to the me of several years ago; the skin and bone shadow of a person who was lying in a hospital bed, and tell her that she is going to be okay.

I want her to know that, contrary to the beliefs of her teachers and family, she would get into her dream course in University. I want her to know all of this, but one of the most bittersweet aspects of things getting better is that you will not be able to comprehend it as a possibility until it happens. I can’t tell that version of me, but if I could here is a letter to the Me who was suffering with Anorexia Nervosa.

—————-

Dear Me,

I know you feel like you can never recover from this. You can’t bear to look at pictures from your childhood. You were always the chubby child in primary school and I cannot remember a time when it didn’t upset you.

When you were twelve, your teacher decided to educate your class on the importance of making healthy food choices. You watched a very dramatic documentary about the revolting consequences of eating McDonald’s regularly. You learned about how much fat was in each brand of cereal and in egg yolks.

Your teacher wasn’t aware that these facts would stick in your head for years to come, even now as I’m writing this. That teacher didn’t realise that these classes would be one of the reasons you have spent the majority of a year in hospital, struggling to eat a slice of toast.

I know you see nothing wrong with the diet that lead you to lying where you are now, with a drip in your hand and your family questioning your future. What began as another one of your phased diets has ended in you eating barely anything each day.

However, you are there because you have a problem. It is a problem that thrives on secrecy and denial, and you will have to admit its existence in order to recover. This is going to be really difficult, but you will do it.

You have a problem. You probably should have realised it when your stomach went into reverse and you were force fed through a tube down your throat. You should have realised you were in trouble when the three minute walk from the bus stop to your school gave you chest pains. It was clear to everyone else when you couldn’t stand up for too long without your vision being speckled with black dots and feeling an intense wave of nausea.

When your doctor took one look at you, she realised immediately that you needed help and you need to realise that too.

You may think the nurses are borderline evil for sitting with you during meal times, insuring you eat that sandwich. You have cried many times because you are forced to swallow calorie drinks. As time goes on, you will grow to like these nurses. They were very good to you.

You should know that you will pull through this. You will be discharged from hospital and granted permission to return to school. You will have the energy to socialise and communicate with people, something I know you haven’t done in the last year. You will make friends, some of whom you no longer talk to and some that you still adore and see regularly today.

These friends all will support you when you relapse next year. They motivate you to climb up from your lowest ever weight and become healthy enough to start aiming towards a better future.

Despite struggling with your mental health, you will start working towards the goal you’ve had since you were a child. You will study hard and do well in your exams. You proceed to do Journalism and New Media in The University of Limerick.

You will be able to move out of home, live with seven other fantastically strange students and be able to maintain eating regularly. I know you used not be able to bear eating in front of others, but you have grown so much that you can now joke about your strange diet with your housemates. Well done.

Through your course, you will meet like-minded people who you connect with and adore. You consider some of the people you’ve met to be some of your best friends.

I’m not going to lie to you and say absolutely everything is perfect. You still struggle with your mental health and anxiety, but you have definitely improved. You still cannot eat any junk food and your diet is still unvaried. Sometimes I feel like it will always be that way, but I try to remember that you never thought you’d get to where I am now and here we are.

I have to remember that I have come from the dark place that you thought was never ending, and I am telling myself that there is hope. I am still not completely happy with my body, but I am doing much better than I was when I was in your place. You have that to look forward to.

Finally, I want you to know that you are at the point where you can use this experience to help others. You want to break the stigma that eating disorders are a “Teenage girl issue”. You want to break down gender and age barriers, because eating disorders can affect absolutely everyone.

You want to encourage other college students to seek help for their issues. You are going to want to share your story to let others know that if they are suffering in the way you did, there is hope. You want everyone with an eating disorder to know it is possible to achieve things that seem impossible.

I am proud of you.

Good luck,

Ann

According to a report featured on CNN, the average teen spends about 9 hours a day on media. This is probably the one single thing that takes up most of their day. Therefore, what kind of effect is this having on young people’s mental health? Is there a connection between mental health illnesses and social media? Are we over-using social media?

Facebook, Snapchat, Instagram, Twitter are just some forms of communication we use today. Particularly young people. Whenever we attend an event, hang out with friends or have a cosy day wrapped in a blanket watching Netflix we feel the urge to post about it on social media. Why is this? Is this because we want everyone to know what we are up to? Is it because we want to have one of those idealised lives that we only see on social media? These thoughts are running through our heads and there is so much pressure behind posting the right photo and making sure it’ll be accepted by our online friends.

Firstly, why do we use social media? There’s the traditional use of communication. But now, is there more of a psychological reason for our constant logging in? Some people may be able to say that they’re addicted to social media. Whenever they sit down on a bus or are about to have lunch they peek at their phones to see what’s happening on the online world. They’ve invented a scale now to measure whether you’re addicted to Facebook, it’s called the Berge Facebook Addiction Scale.

But why is it that we’re addicted to social media? A researcher at the Freie Universität in Germany said that “As human beings, we evolved to care about our reputation”. So, when we upload a photo we’re mostly uploading it for other people. We want others to react to what we’ve put up and our brain wants to receive “rewards” by having all our online friends like and agree with what we’ve put up.

Is this good for our mental health? We are constantly trying to impress others. We are trying to live up to these expectations people have for us. And what happens if we choose not to live the socially accepted online life? Quite often people have a negative response which can possibly lead to cyberbullying. This can leave young people insecure and anxious which can later develop into depression, anorexia and many more issues.

But is this the only effect social media is having on our mental health or is there other ways it can affect us? With social media, you have the power to post whatever you want. This can be related to any topic under the sun. Unfortunately, some people do not have a filter when it comes to posting or they simply don’t think of the effect it will have on others. Some articles that you read online can really sink into your mind and that thought can linger for an extremely long amount of time. This is very dangerous for young people’s mental health because you really don’t know how certain things will affect others because no two people are the same.

There have been studies proving that the use of social media makes us miserable. Researchers from the University of Michigan adopted an “experience sampling”. They asked 82 Facebook users 5 questions about their mood over 14 days. When they spent more time on Facebook their moods began to get worse and when they interacted more with others in real life they felt better over time.

But is there a way we can use social media to help young people with mental health issues? Of course! We can help raise awareness for problems and inform people on all the different kinds of mental health issues.

We just need to be careful that we’re taking care of ourselves by not spending too much time online. We can turn off our phones now and again (don’t worry I promise the internet will still be there when you turn your phone back on again). Make sure not to post stuff because others want you to and not to look for acceptance from others because not everyone will always agree with you, which is ok.

As the new academic year begins in earnest, students begin the annual burden of getting their financial affairs in order. Many of these students will be beginning this process for the very first time with questions about budgeting, savings and even how to go about getting a job. Those moving into final year may be starting to contemplate pensions and even mortgages as they look towards joining the workforce. I surveyed my fellow students to find out their burning personal finance questions, then I went to the owners of DFI Consulting, Daniel Curran and Stephen Curtis to find out the answers…

I worked part time last summer. How do I apply for a tax refund without using a third party website or accountant who will charge me?

When you are starting your first job you should register with PAYE Anytime​. Once registered you, and to avoid emergency tax, register the details of your new job through the Jobs and Pensions service in myAccount. You will need your employer’s tax registration number to do this and you can get this from your employer. If the revenue has not received either a Certificate of Tax Credits (for first time workers) or a Form P45 (for those previously in employment) before your first payday they will be forced to deduct emergency tax. If you work part time or for part of the year, you may also be due a tax refund. You can make claims for the previous 4 calendar years so you may have money owed to you that you don’t even know about and it can often be worth hundreds of Euros.

Follow this link for a free, step-by-step guide on how to make a tax refund claim – goo.gl/uebo7Y

How do I make my money work for me?

Starting to save is a great habit to get into early in life. Saving is something that we all tend to put on the long finger but if you start early you can have a huge positive impact on your finances. The best way to proceed is to start small. Saving €20 a week will put over a grand in your pocket after 12 months and then every year you can aim to increase this amount. It’s not so much about the actual money you will accumulate now, it’s more of an exercise in developing the habit of saving which will pay huge dividends in the long run.

I am interested in the idea of investing but it seems so daunting. Is there any way I can start small without having to be a finance expert?

We all like the idea of picking a stock or share that nobody has heard of, watch it soar in value and net a huge windfall. In truth it doesn’t work like that but investing is something that everyone can access. The easiest place to get started is with managed funds – a managed fund involves a number of investors feeding into one pool of money which is invested by an experienced fund manager. The easiest place to get started with these funds in Ireland is Rabo Direct – they have over 50 that you can go wild with. A word of warning – you can lose money with these funds and you’re not guaranteed to get all your money back.

What is a pension and why do I need one?

We all want to retire at some point and a pension is the income that we will live on once we’re not working any more. The state pays about €220 a week but if you want more than that you’re going to have to save for it. Some companies set up pension schemes for their employees and help with contributions or you can set up one yourself. The money is then professionally invested by fund managers. The general rules is that the income that you will have when you retire depends on how much your contributions amount to plus any increase in the value in your fund.

The most important thing to stress when it comes to pensions is the miracle of compound interest – the multiplier effect of interest compounding on interest over a long period of time. Put simply – if you saved €1000 per month towards a pension from age 21-30 and then locked away the cash and never added another cent, compound interest would mean that at 70 you would have a pension pot worth more than someone who saved €1000 per month from the age of 30-70 assuming both grow at the average rate of 7%. It’s hard to believe but it’s true. Getting to grips with this powerful effect can help you understand why starting a pension early is the way to go.

I want to own my own home one day. Property, especially in Dublin, is so expensive right now, how much should I be saving when I start my first full time job in order to afford a mortgage and how long will it take?

Although home ownership isn’t on the radar for most college students, widespread media coverage of the current housing crisis, especially in Dublin and the impact that the resulting rent crisis has had on students means that the whole topic of mortgages, rent and home ownerships is on the minds of students like never before. The most important aspect of home ownership that students should understand is that it’s a marathon, not a sprint.

The first hurdle to securing that elusive first mortgage is to have the necessary deposit. The Central Bank recently changed the rules for deposits and if you want to buy a house for more than €220k you will need a deposit of 10% up to €220k and 20% for everything after that. So if the house you would like to buy costs €300k you will need a deposit of €22k on the first €220k and €16k on the remaining €80k or €38k in total. Like I said, it’s a marathon, not a sprint.

After that the bank will want to make sure that you can repay the loan and again the Central Bank have rules on how much they will lend you. Typically, 3.5 times earnings is the max they will lend. So going back to our €300k house – once you have the €38k saved you will need to borrow €262k. If the bank will lend you only 3.5 times salary you will need an income of €75k to qualify for the mortgage.

Gina Canny is a Final Year Commerce student in UCD and an Intern at DFI Consulting, a Dublin based HR & Financial Advisory firm. 

Since I was in primary school I always felt I was an outsider yet I never appeared it (at least not to others). I remember I would worry about things that children my age wouldn't have and I some times believed I was feeling things so much deeper than others would. Growing up, I realised that this would prove to be my greatest weakness but also my greatest strength because I could teach my mind to work for me and recognise when it works against me. It's no doubt people encounter extremely low periods in their life but when we fall into this difficult time we need to learn how to get back up and the only way I could actually do this was by learning to accept myself.

Recently all the dark times I've faced have been playing back in my mind and I've just been stumbling all over the place. I have been mainly having trouble maintaining my high fitness level, sleeping, relaxing and being comfortable with who I am as an individual. So many times I would tell myself "you're an absolute idiot" that I was actually not seeing the damage I was doing to myself. As weeks were passing on I was becoming more troubled, I would convince myself that everyone around me was sick of me, provoking me to lose trust in them and back off. I identified with what I was doing and how I was feeling but I forgot to ask myself; "Why are you feeling like this?" Simple, I'm not learning to accept myself.

Informing myself that I was an idiot and beating myself up over how I am has done me no favours. A friend once told me "I look to into things" but who cares? Yeah so I question everything and play back conversations in my head a 100 times wondering if I said something wrong but that's just me. I've tried so hard to stop embracing parts of my personality that I've practically become my own worst enemy when I should really be my own best friend.

So instead of self hating and closing myself off from the world I told myself that I needed to stop for a moment and consider the fact that I'm me for a reason. Many people I know love to go out to parties and drink, deep down I know that's not me, I would rather drink tea and sit by the fire by myself or with a loved one and that's okay, I'm not the only one. My friends want the newest make up and make up brushes whereas I am so thankful that my make up brushes are labelled or I wouldn't have a clue what I'm doing.

Basically what I am trying to say is, I must acknowledge the fact that I have certain aspects to my character. I'm anxious and I'm reserved but that's not entirely a bad thing once I learn to control these weak spots. Being anxious? It's obviously exhausting but I will most likely arrive to work and hand in an assignment for college on time because of it. Being reserved? Well at least I take into account that the people I love dearly are my world and that some people are worth letting your guard down for. I don't have to be anyone I'm not to suit everyone else. If I had to offer a piece of advice to anyone reading this it would be just to accept yourself, better yourself if you wish but do not tear yourself apart that you forget how to put the pieces back together.

You’ve done it. You submitted the CV, they’ve called you back. They want an interview. The initial exhilaration is now replaced with minor panic; you now have to face judge, jury and executioner. This is not a drill. How exactly does one prepare for an interview? It will always depend on the company you’re interviewing with and the personalities you’ll meet across the boardroom table (or if you’re as unfortunate as I have been, the kitchen table, because they forgot you were coming). I’ve put together some advice for those of you heading into the interview stage, as it’s often an incredibly daunting part of the hiring process.

Do your research

You should have done the bare minimum in order to tailor your CV, but now is the time to do some real digging. Know the company well. Scour their webpage for links to their social media accounts, their current events, their projects, reviews, publications, and their aims and objectives. As you go, keep a list of queries, questions and points of interest. Bring some of these up in the interview to show that you have done your homework and demonstrate that you are not only interested, you are informed.

Know the company

When you’re thinking about possible questions they could ask, consider how the company operates. How would you fit in with the work they do and the projects they’re involved in? What role do you want and how could you contribute? What do they want from candidates? Why do you want to work there? Review the job spec if you’re stuck for ideas.

SOAR

When addressing questions, frame your answers using SOAR: – Situation – Obstacles – Actions – Results. The interviewers may give you hypothetical situations, or ask you to provide real life situations from your previous employment (never, ever, badmouth your previous employer in an interview. It will come off as petty and unprofessional). You may be asked something along the lines of “Describe a time when a co-worker and yourself weren't getting along”. Here, you are expected to outline the S and O, as well as the A and R. The R should be positive.

Be prepared

On the day, make sure to bring two clean copies of your CV and a pen. Chances are they will have a copy of your CV ready and waiting, but be one step ahead. Interviewers will go through your CV with you and ask questions relating to the relevant parts of your CV. Take the initiative and show that you are prepared and organised.

Be early

Get there about 15 minutes early; you don’t want to loiter with an ever growing mass of nerves. You will be nervous. Remember to breathe and speak slowly and clearly (when your mind is racing, it’s easy to jibber jabber). Dress appropriately for the interview. Email HR beforehand and they will be happy to tell you the dress code. If you need to confirm an address or ask about travel details, do so in advance. Give a strong handshake, remember to smile, sit up straight and maintain eye contact. Even if you’re nervous, you want to exude confidence.

This is generally how an interview progresses. The interviewers will introduce themselves and exchange handshakes and pleasantries. They’ll start off by outlining the demands of the position and perhaps give you a bit of background about the company and themselves (but you will know all of this because of your extensive research). Your interviewers will then ask you to tell them a little bit about yourself; be honest and be conversational. It’s not a Garda vet. Having broken the ice, the interviewers will move on to the business side of things. This is where they will go through your CV and ask the difficult questions. You should do most of the talking; they are trying to get to know you as a candidate. They will then ask if you have any questions (hint: yes you do). Prepare four, ask one or two. Something along the lines of “What do you enjoy about working here?” Finally, as you conclude the interview and say your goodbyes, don’t forget to say thank you. Regardless of the outcome, it ends the interview on a positive note for both the interviewers and interviewee.    

If in the event that the interview does not go well, write down what you think you did wrong, and how you would handle it next time (I did not anticipate a question about progression to a different department within an industry; it cost me the job). Learn from it. Then forgive yourself and move on from it. It’s important to maintain belief in yourself, even after disappointment.

If the interview does go well, make a note of what you think you did right, it’s important to reflect on the positives. Interviewing is not easy, and it’s likely that you’ll have to go through the process numerous times before you nail it. Congratulate yourself when you do. You deserve a pat on the back, a large cappuccino and a salad. You’re a yuppie now.

We’re going on a job hunt. It’s difficult to get started. Whether it’s an internship, your first job after university or a career change, getting your foot on the bottom rung of the employment ladder is the hardest part. There are a lot of equally skilled and qualified people out there and it’s not always easy to set yourself apart. The following information is meant to be more of a general guide for you to begin with. Above all, remember that you’ll have to tailor every single part of your application to the specific job you are applying for. No exceptions. Yes, it takes work and you may not always get a call back, but it will be worth it when you do.

Before you start

A word of warning – your first challenge is to make it through the elimination round. Once an ad is posted, employers are bombarded with responses; hundreds of applications for one position. To deal with this initial round of inundation, recruiters will put CVs through a rigorous process to eliminate as many as possible (think The Hunger Games but with hopes and dreams). Only those that remain will be considered for an interview. Remember this when you are writing your CV.

Research, research, research

Identify a type of role or an industry you want to target and find a couple of opportunities that line up what skills you possess and what skills you want to develop. Read the job spec. Read several. Pay close attention to the language ads use and the skills they are looking for. This will give you a good sense of what to include in your CV and what to leave out.

Formatting

Before you start to write, think about formatting. You want your CV to be accessible and legible, with clear delineated sections; personal information (number, email, address), work experience (chronologically), education (if you’ve graduated from university, leave out the Leaving Cert). Make it easy to scan by avoiding paragraphs, this is not an essay. Your experience section should be short and snappy as you want to showcase the skills and points that your potential employer wants; you need to make an impression on HR in the limited time they will take to scan your CV.  Have a look at some templates here.

Use social media to your advantage

Set up a LinkedIn and a Jobbio profile to maximise your hiring potential. LinkedIn will be vital for you when on the job hunt. Think of it as a professional social media profile (which should include a professional picture and your location). Keep your LinkedIn account up-to-date and synchronised with the other application materials mentioned such as your CV and use the “Jobs” tab in LinkedIn to filter what job suggestions will come your way.

Clean up your social media

In a digital age where pretty much everything you say online is public domain, it’s important to ensure your online presence is private. Google yourself. If there are photos, posts or comments you wouldn’t want a prospective employer to see, then privatise or delete them (remember when you had that really bad dye job in secondary school? #hackofye).

No need to list everything

You do not need to list your complete work history. If you would like to, include a list under a section titled “Other Employment”. If you have had extensive experience, or several short term jobs or internships that aren’t related to the job you are currently applying for, leave them out. You want to highlight work history that shows a connection to the positions you’re applying to.

Highlight what is relevant

If you don’t have much experience and you’re sending out CVs for the first time, highlight the relevance of your education. For example, I studied history so when I began the job search I emphasised research and analytical skills, the ability to work to deadlines, and the ability to synthesise and present research. Whatever your degree, you have extremely valuable skills; they just need to be reframed in the language of your target industry. When you don’t have experience, make sure your interest is readily apparent.

Experiences to improve your CV

Freelance work or internships (if you have the means to) are ways of adding experience. Make sure that you create a portfolio or keep a log of the work you do while freelancing so that you have a record of each individual project and the skills you improved upon or learnt. Freelance work should be listed on your CV (chronologically) just like other jobs, it is just as valuable.

References

Don’t include references on your CV. If your potential employer wants your references, they will ask for them. However, do have a separate document prepared in the same format, font and style as your CV with your list of references to forward on to HR in the event you get the job.

Account for gaps in your CV

If you were unemployed, travelling the world, or riding magic carpets with Aladdin in Agrabah for a brief period of time, include it. It may also provide an interesting talking point in the interview. Leaving a blank space will raise more questions than answers. In your cover letter, you can address your employment gap in a forward-thinking and positive manner saying that you are ready to enter the workforce, take on a new challenge and offer your skills to…(insert company buzzwords here).

Start with the cover letter

The cover letter should be the last thing you write when drafting your CV. Keep it as a separate document in the same font, format and style as your CV. Firstly, address the cover letter to the hiring manager (where you can’t locate this information “to whom it may concern” is your best bet). You should provide a clear overview of what you do currently and your experience so far. Then communicate where you’re looking to take your career (remember all that research you did?). Why are you applying for this job? When are you available? What are the company’s long term goals and challenges? Why are you suitable? Finish your cover letter on a positive note; it will make it more pleasant to read.

Keep upskilling

If you are unemployed in the meantime, keep trying to upskill yourself. Find online courses from websites like Futurelearn, Coursera or edX where courses are free and relatively short. Expand upon this even further by searching for voluntary positions or internships in the area you’re interested in (if you can afford to).

Stay positive

Finally, try not to get bogged down when you’re looking for work. It takes patience and perseverance, so focus on what you can do and what you can change to get there. Apply for jobs on a regular basis, two or three a day to keep on top of new opportunities and ensure you don’t overlook possible avenues of employment you hadn’t considered. Incentivise yourself. It will take a while, but setting small goals each day will give you a small sense of accomplishment. You’ve got this.

On a cold, clear afternoon drive in early January I’m rapidly transported into a mental territory I’m completely unfamiliar with. My heart begins to beat so quick I was convinced I was having a heart attack. My hands were clammy. I felt sick, the type of sick in your stomach that you can’t quite pinpoint to a definite location. You just know it’s not right. My hands and feet became tingly, like that feeling you get before you pass out. My body temperature soared, sweating inexplicably. The very car I’m driving, the wheel I’m holding, the vibration of the road making contact with the wheels seemed so alien and unfamiliar. My mate in the passenger seat, whom I had spent the last few days with, was completely unaware.

When everything suddenly felt wrong

I kept chatting, adjusted the radio, cranked up the air con but I had to pull over. I was panicked. “What was happening to me?”, I thought. I was paranoid of my environment. I mentioned out-loud that I didn’t feel well and explained what was happening as best I could. My friend assured me it was just the hangover shakes from the few-too-many we had the night before (and probably the night before that) but I was unconvinced. Leaving the car to get some air, I remember glancing at my friends worried facial expression. Why was he worried? Was I going crazy? Why couldn’t I think straight? Should I call an ambulance? What do I even explain to the them if I do?

What was happening to me?

I took a breath, lots of rapid breaths actually. I tried to focus on my breathing because I knew I was hyperventilating. I was trying to focus on anything to be honest. My grip on reality was loosening, I felt like I was being unplugged from the matrix or some sh*t. Out of site of the passing traffic I crouched down on the passenger side of the car, my face pressed against the cold metallic exterior while I tried everything to regain control of my bearings, my sanity. Whatever it was, it wasn’t pleasant to say the very least.

A journey back home, an encounter with worried parents and an emergency trip to the doctors later revealed that I had a panic attack. My GP prescribed me with some valium and that night before the calming effects set in I thought “wow, THAT was a panic attack?”

My first panic attack was a shock

Up until that point I had been ignorant to the severity of panic attack symptoms. In my pre-attack stupidity, I assumed it really only meant you were a bit ‘off’ or anxious in it’s mild interpretation. How I was wrong. My mind had snapped so to speak, my mental health was deteriorating and I was scared.

I had just been through a pretty horrible break up prior to my first panic attack. We parted ways on December 26th last. I was heartbroken, lost and depressed.  As you would be after a four-year long relationship. I wasn’t sleeping and even when I did, vivid dreams haunted my ever-tired mind. The first attack was, as I have since learnt, a physical symptom of mental stress and strain. My mind had just had enough; it was though my thoughts had imploded inwards with nowhere to escape. At the time I was drinking more than I should in an effort to ‘forget’ the pain of loss. I was obsessively checking my ex’s social media, which made everything so much worse. Don’t do it if you break up with someone by the way, it will tear you up inside. It wasn’t to be my last episode but if you’ve read this far I can assure you things got better. It’s cliché to say I know, but it did.

I’m in a very public job. I had to manage being on the radio everyday to thousands of people – people who expected to hear the “happy” Dave Cronin – with the fallout of my break up and its associated depression, stress and anxiety. So, I decided to get medicinal therapy when it all got a bit too much again, I was seeing a psychologist regularly but above all I was determined to “feel better”.

Trying to get better while pretending I was fine

With the help of some amazing friends, parents, work mates and doctors I was on the road to recovery. When I started to feel better it was like a physical weight had been lifted. The sunny days actually started to look bright and not dark like it did. I was having fun, not pretending to, like I had done. My depression stayed somewhat and I’m still trying to jump that particular hurdle. But my anxiety attacks became less frequent and for the last few months, I’m pleased to say, has disappeared. Being a presenter, oddly helped and acted as a therapy of sorts. It’s a high pressure job. I had to be professional and provide an entertainment service so I convinced myself to be happy. It worked.

I’m sharing this because I care

I’ve just turned twenty-five, I know so many lads who have lost friends to suicide much younger than me. I’ve lost friends younger than me. It truly is an epidemic amongst young males in particular who may have experienced something similar, less or worse to what I have. I’m in the fortunate position of being influential to others and I give up a little bit of useless privacy in sharing my story in the hope that it just might give you the encouragement to seek help.

I share my story not for attention because it’s what us media-types do but because I care. I care that we are losing people to something that can be fixed. I care that some of those in power appear not to care enough in the provision of youth mental health services. I care about you and me and the need for us to collectively care about each other more. If you care, care about yourself and care about your mate who seems a little distant. I, like Kelly Clarkson, am a firm believer in ‘what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger’. But don’t do it alone. It may be stormy now but it never rains forever…Even in Ireland!

Depression and suicidal thoughts often make us feel trapped, as if there’s no way out. What overcoming depression and suicidal ideation taught me was that I needed to learn how to cope, I needed a distraction. To overcome those moments when you feel you are losing control, you need to find a way to keep hold. The following list consists of ways in which I was able to keep my suicidal ideation at bay and cope with it when it arose. It is not meant to be exhaustive, but it is meant to help you turn the tide.

Find alternatives

Find alternatives for when self harm is too much of a risk. Snap a rubber band on your wrist, rip up paper, throw clothes around. Anything that allows you some sort of release.

Have a look at this article for other helping coping methods to reduce self-harm.

Learn to breathe

Diaphragmatic (Belly) breathing is effective when anxiety or extreme sadness strikes. Start belly breathing immediately and it will help you feel calm and in control fast. There are online guides to help you.            

Look after your body 

Eat well, even on the days you have no appetite. Avoid alcohol and drugs, as both are a dangerous cocktail that can exacerbate how low you’re feeling. Try to abstain as best you can. When you can’t, make sure you are not by yourself.

Exercise

Go for a run. If you can’t run, walk. Choosing not to listen to suicidal thoughts and actively trying to improve your mood through exercise is something you can do by yourself. If you need motivation, ask a friend to join you. Start small and gradually try making exercise a habit.

Shower

When you find yourself unable to talk to anyone, take a long hot shower. It’s a warm, comforting, quiet place away from everything where you can get some respite. On the nights that you’re struggling to sleep it’ll help too.

Realise that you are not alone

The most crushing feature of suicidal thoughts is the idea that you are alone. You fear an enemy you can never escape from, that one day you will die alone by your own hand and feel powerless to stop it. But you can. Talk to friends. You don’t have to tell them everything, but do let them know you are not okay. Take a walk with someone. Just getting out of the house and into the open air can help ground you a little. Call someone on the days you cannot leave the house; if you feel unsafe, ask someone to come to you.

Create a self-care kit

For me, this was one of the most effective ways of coping. At one point my kit included a colouring book, some hot chocolate and a teddy bear. I saved conversations with my favourite people (something I still do) alongside a list of my goals for the year. Whether it is your favourite photos, a journal in which to write down how you feel; it is all useful. Articles or columns that you find meaningful, jokes that make you laugh. Anything else that reminds you of reasons to stay alive. Make a list of the things you want to do, places you want to go, people you want to see. When you feel lonely, or when no one else is awake, turn to your self-care kit to remind you that things will get better.

Write

Keep a mood journal. Write down your thoughts, your feelings, and keep track of your mood triggers. Not only does this provide relief in the short term, it’s a useful way to understand your own moods and emotions in the long run so you can work toward altering your behavioural habits.

Practice mindfulness

Mindfulness refers to awareness of your thoughts, feelings, body, and environment. It teaches you to pay attention to your thoughts and feelings without judging them. There are free online resources for you to practice. Once you understand your triggers, you can gradually change how you react. Practicing mindfulness can distract you when suicidal thoughts arise and will teach you better coping skills in the long run. 

Cognitive behavioural therapy

Supplement your mood journal with a CBT book. CBT aims to help you deal with immediate, overwhelming problems in a more positive way by breaking them down into smaller parts. It shows you practical ways to change negative patterns and improve your state of mind on a daily basis. 

Visit your GP

You will not be judged. Your suicidal ideation and depression are not a shameful secret. Doctor-patient confidentiality means you will not be ‘outed’.  Your GP is a qualified health care professional who can give you a proper diagnosis. Bring your mood journal with you when going through your symptoms to ensure that you leave nothing out. Together with your GP you can establish a medically supervised road to recovery. They will listen, they will understand, they will help.

Remember that it takes time. Be kind to yourself; you are not trying to be perfect you are trying to make progress. Recognise your emotions are something outside yourself, not whom you are. It is possible to overcome suicidal ideation and depression; good habits take work to form. Make changes when you feel capable. Recovery starts with baby steps. Stay determined.

Transition Year was, for me, undoubtedly the best year of my life and I'm certainly a better person for it. While I enjoyed TY and got so much from it, I know for a fact that many people in my year hated TY and thought it was boring. I suppose they are the people who sat back doing nothing, and at the end of the day TY can only be as good as you make it, so here's my advice for getting the most out of TY.

Be open-minded

TY isn't a doss year. Sure you don't do as much classroom work as other years but there's still plenty to be done. If you go into school and sit back with your feet up for the year you're going to be bored, simple. But if you go into TY willing to do work and take opportunities you're going to have a blast. And that leads me to my next point.

Take the opportunities offered

TY is full of opportunities, everything from trips to various courses. I highly recommend making the most of these opportunities. Okay, I will admit that trips are expensive, there's no way around it but when you can afford it make sure you go. The trips I went on in TY are some of the best experiences I've ever had. I usually like to stay at home confined to my room, but I'm honestly so glad I went on the trips I did. Likewise goes for the courses your school offers, even if it's something you don't think you'll enjoy, do it, you don't know when it might come in handy. I'm personally not a GAA fan but I thoroughly enjoyed a GAA coaching course I took part in.

Push yourself

TY boosted my confidence so much, and I'm honestly so grateful for it. I pushed myself in TY to do things I never would have dreamt of doing otherwise. The shy girl I was a year ago, crying over how badly the Junior Cert went, would never in her wildest dreams have got up on a stage in front of 150 plus people dancing, singing and acting like a crazy person. Yet here I am a year later able to say that I played a principle role in our TY Musical, what? 3rd year me is laughing in disbelief! Make TY the year where you push yourself, whether that be trying out for your school musical or speaking up in class for the first time, make sure you push yourself out of comfort zone (even just a small bit). I can guarantee you'll be so happy you did.

Make the most of your time out of school

TY comes with the promise of minimal homework, meaning you're going to have plenty of time after school. Take this time to start something new, something you've always wanted to do. I personally didn't take advantage of this time as much as I should have. So please, don't make my mistake of abusing this extra time (it will be gone once 5th year starts).

Make the most of work experience

Work Experience is a huge part of TY and you shouldn't let it slip between your fingertips. Work Experience gives you the chance to discover what you may want to do when you're older, and also what you definitely don't want to do. All my life I was certain I wanted to be teacher (basic, I know) and now because of work experience I know for certain that I do NOT want to be a teacher *shudders*. Turns out teaching isn't for me, I think I'll stick to my animals, thank you very much. On top of discovering what you like and dislike work experience gives you the chance to add to your CV, boost your confidence, and start making connections in the working world. Work Experience opened me up to a whole new world *starts blasting Aladdin* I didn't even know existed, and that I happen to really enjoy.

Get to know the other people in your year

I'm the kind of person who sits quietly in the classroom and only talks to her friends, but because of TY I now know the people in my year a lot better. We may never all be close friends but at least I know them all a bit better than I did a year ago. All the trips and situations requiring team work mean you're inevitably going to get to know the people in your year better. Make sure to make an effort to be nice and friendly with everyone, it's the best way to get along with them, and get to know them better.

Have fun and finally, HAVE FUN!

Isn't that what TY is all about anyway? I hope this offered you some insight on how to really enjoy Transition Year.

At SpunOut.ie, we pride ourselves on providing reliable information to young people so they can lead healthier, happier lives. When we relaunched SpunOut.ie last November we made sure that the website worked well for our users who view the website using a screen reader. Today, we are taking further steps towards making our information accessible to all young people, regardless of their vision. 

Introducing 'High Contrast Mode' for SpunOut.ie

Our first update is what we are calling 'High Contrast Mode'. This setting does a few things which will help readers with colour blindness or poor vision to more easily read SpunOut.ie's 2,000+ pages. It dramatically increases the contrast (shades of colours) between the background, text and structure of the website so things stand out far more. This makes the website easier to read and far clearer to understand. Not a single piece of information has changed, just how it looks. Users with colour blindness will also notice how we do not use multiple colours and keep the display clean, putting the information front and centre. 

'Dynamic Font Control' across the entire website

Another new feature for the website is better control over the websites' font size. Since November we offered users the ability to increase the font size on articles, now we are delighted to announce that you can do the same for every piece of text on every page. The text on the navigation area, reccomended articles and rccommend services will all increase with the articles's text size. This will allow our readers to find the information they need and view it in a way that they like. 

Our committment to more accessible information for everyone

We at SpunOut.ie are firmly committed to making our information accessible to all readers. We are constantly looking at ways to improve what we have, and offer more options in the future. We hope you enjoy these features and can't wait to bring you more in the future, after all, the internet is for everyone.

 

My name is Conal Browne and I’m twenty-two years old. I’m a child of the peace process, the first generation in Northern Ireland’s history to grow up without the threat of violence hanging over my future. I’m barely older than the North’s democracy and I’ve personally benefited hugely from the increasing political stability here, a stability to which I had grown accustomed, a stability that was shattered on Thursday June 23, 2016. The new uncertain world we are moving into is one which I am apprehensive about. Considering it is the centenary of 1916, I find this line from W.B Yeats more and more apt every passing day “All changed, changed utterly: A terrible beauty is born.”

Northern Ireland is the only place in the UK with an EU land border, a currently heavily reduced land border with the Republic. The state of this border is directly challenged by the Brexit result. The porous border is part of our economy's life blood. Our region’s economy is linked so deeply with the Republic that a return to a hard border and customs posts would be catastrophic. However, the border means far more than its huge economic impact to the people in Northern Ireland. To some it represents the line at which their United Kingdom starts. For me, the near invisible border makes my connection to my Ireland all the stronger and that is under threat.

I’m from and live in Bangor, the second biggest settlement in Belfast Lough. The coast dominates the town and surrounding country. Every day you are likely to see a new freight ship heading up the lough or the oil rigs under repair in Belfast’s harbour. Even though Belfast’s industrial peak lies in its past, the lough’s water is still the life blood for the regional economy here. The huge amount of goods moved through the port and our reliance on the harbour make me wonder did anyone consider our regional economy on the Leave side. I think not.

When we started our peace process and our long road to reconciliation, we recognised the principle of consent, that Northern Ireland’s position constitutionally should not change without the agreement of the Northern Irish electorate. On the 23rd of June, Northern Ireland voted to remain. Yet so far I have been angered by what we are seeing from Westminster, an unfolding crisis ready to run roughshod over the young democracy that exists here. Brexit threatens some of the key relations and principles set out in the Good Friday Agreement, placing the EU at the heart of the peace process through funding and through fostering the three strands of relations that helped bring us peace, Dublin-London, North-South and reconciliation in the North all have links to the EU through funding or through treaties.

It makes me feel pessimistic about the future of this place, that extra barriers to cooperation and solidarity could be erected between my Irish, British and European brothers and sisters. It makes me feel pessimistic that no economic plan for here has been created for this post-Brexit Northern Ireland. From our ports to our farms to our young people’s future, Northern Ireland stands in flux after Brexit “Changed utterly a terrible beauty is born.”

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