Lymphogranuloma venereum, or LGV, is a type of chlamydia. LGV is mainly diagnosed in gay and bi men and men who have sex with men (MSM).

How do you get lymphogranuloma venereum?

You can get lymphogranuloma venereum through unprotected anal, oral or vaginal sex, rimming (mouth-to-anus contact), fingering or sharing sex toys with someone who has the infection.

What are the symptoms of lymphogranuloma venereum?

Symptoms often develop around 3 days to 3 weeks after sexual contact. In those who frequently have anal sex, it is mostly seen in the rectum (back passage).

Symptoms include:

What does a test for lymphogranuloma venereum involve?

The test for LGV is the same type of test that is used for chlamydia. A swab can be taken from the rectum (back passage), vagina, throat, or an ulcer (if you have one). You will need to visit your GP or an STI clinic to have these tests. 

The sample is initially tested for chlamydia. If it tests positive for chlamydia and your doctor suspects LGV infection, further specialist testing for LGV is carried out.

How is lymphogranuloma venereum treated?

LGV is usually treated with an antibiotic called doxycycline for 3 weeks. Usually, there are no lasting effects, as long as the infection is treated correctly. You will be asked to return for another test after your treatment to confirm you have cleared the infection.

What about my partner?

If you have LGV, your current partner (or partners) will also be offered testing and treatment.

It is important that all of the people you have recently been in sexual contact with are given the option to be tested and treated. Read our article on how to tell your partner you have an STI for advice on how to have this conversation.

When can I have sex again?

If you visit a GP or sexual health clinic, you will be advised to take a break from sex (even oral sex and sex with condoms) until you and your partner/s have finished the treatment and have no symptoms. It’s important that you don’t have sex with your partner before they are tested and treated as if you could become infected again.

What happens if my lymphogranuloma venereum is left untreated?

If your LGV is untreated, it can be passed on to your sexual partners.

Some types of LGV can cause:

How can I prevent myself from getting lymphogranuloma venereum again?

There are many great options to help protect your sexual health, but none of them are 100% effective. Even if you use condoms every time you have penetrative sex, you are still at risk of getting genital warts and herpes, as these can be passed through skin-to-skin contact. Going for an STI check or taking a home STI testing kit with a partner before having sex, can be a great way of protecting yourself and those you have sex with against STIs and HIV. However, not all STI checks check for all STIs, so it is important to speak to your healthcare provider and ask them what are being tested for as part of your screening.

Discussing with your sexual partners the type of contraception or protection options available to you, and agreeing on a type that works for everyone involved can help to reduce the risk of pregnancy, STIs and HIV. Looking out for sores or symptoms on a partner’s genitals before having sex with them, can help to identify STIs that they may not be aware of. If you do see any signs that someone may have an STI, do not have sex with them until you know for certain it is safe to do so. Asking someone about their sexual health history is the responsible thing to do before having sex, and it should not be taken as an insult if someone asks you about yours.  

Looking after your mental health after an STI diagnosis 

If you are diagnosed with an STI, you might feel a mixture of emotions. Unfortunately, there is still stigma in our society surrounding STIs that can cause some people to feel shame about having one. However, like any other healthcare diagnosis, you are not to blame for your STI and have not done anything “wrong”. Being diagnosed with an STI can have a negative impact on your mental health and wellbeing and if you don’t feel comfortable telling friends or family about it, you might feel isolated and alone. If you have found out you have an STI and you’re finding it difficult to cope, there are things you can do to support your mental health. 

Going to college is a special time in someone’s life. It’s the beginning of your future, the beginning of your career. Some say college is a great milestone in a person’s life and to have that opportunity is more than amazing. However, going to college and suffering with depression can sometimes alter those thoughts and may not give you the same feeling about the experience.

Applying for colleges and deciding what course you want to do can be hard. With depression, your self-esteem and self-worth are low, you may not feel the excitement or confidence in choosing the right course. The thoughts run through your mind, ‘Can I do it?’.

After finally deciding what course you want, you start your first day. You’re nervous, as is everyone. You pick out the nicest casual clothes you own, make sure your hair and makeup is perfect and that nothing is out of place. Depending on the person and how they deal with their depression, some might be more excited than others. Me personally, I was terrified.

It takes a while to get your mind out of the secondary school mode and into a higher range of thinking and work. You need to develop a mind-set and/or mentality that will help you cope with deadlines that are set for assignments, for the independent attendance, even the different teaching style. In secondary school you were given work that was due the following day, now you’re doing work on an exercise that can stretch over a few months that needs constant work.

Many student ‘tackle’ assignments differently. Some will do bit by bit over time, some will do it all before the deadline and then those who do it the night or two before it’s due. Dealing with the stress of depression and having all this work on your shoulders starts to pile up. You don’t just have one assignment, you can have up to four or five at one time, causing stress and worry.

One of the hardest things for someone suffering with depression can be their attendance. On the bad days you’ll want to stay in bed and not move or talk to anyone, you’re too tired to face the day, you feel so low. College attendance can be part of your grades depending on what college or course you’re doing. Not every day is a good day and not every day is a bad day. It takes strength to get out of bed on a bad day and get yourself into college.

One of the most important things when attending college and suffering depression is to let your tutor or lecturer know. I promise they are more understanding than you think. If you need time off for a reason to do with your illness, then they will understand or maybe you need extra time on an assignment. They listen and care about you. Maybe see the college counsellor, every college has one and they’re there to help.

College can be a dreadful place when your head is dark but after a little time, it can become fun and you will see a difference with yourself. Surrounding yourself with good and positive people in college is also a good thing to help. There are so many positive, friendly people in my course and they really do make that little bit of a difference.

Keep your head up, only you can get yourself out of bed into college and only you can work on assignments. You’re not alone, there are loads of college students who suffer with depression and you will prob never know.

Podcasts are having a major moment right now. With so many people on the go, getting to work or school, working out, chores about the house, and even relaxing when all that’s done—it’s no wonder that podcasts are increasing in popularity. They can be informative, imaginative, exciting, and are a lot more portable than a lot of other forms of entertainment. Here’s a quick list of ten outstanding podcasts, in no particular order, that are worth a listen.

1. Serial

Genre: journalistic nonfiction

Yep, that Serial. This is the one you’ve been hearing everyone talk about, and there’s a reason for that. The first season follows the gripping true story of Adnan Syed, who was arrested in 1999 for a crime he said he didn’t commit. No spoilers here, but let’s just say that when Sarah Koenig reopens the case, a riveting and tricky story unfolds, and you’re not going to want to stop listening. The second season, which just started in December, focuses on an American soldier who was imprisoned by the Taliban, and it’s just as engaging as the first. www.serialpodcast.org

2. Radiolab

Genre: science

This funky little podcast takes a look at big questions in science and philosophy, but in a light-hearted, entertaining way. The hosts, Jad Abumrad and Robert Krulwich, introduce weekly topics with titles that range from “Remembering Oliver Sacks” to “Sex, Ducks, and the Founding Feud”. You’ll probably learn quite a few things about a wide variety of tricky science-y topics, but nothing here will ever be too hard to grasp, so give it a listen, even if you’re not that into science. www.radiolab.org

3. Welcome to Night Vale

Genre: mystery, Comedy, Paranormal

Welcome to Night Vale is styled as an old-timey radio news programme broadcast from the fictional desert town of Night Vale, where strange things tend to happen an awful lot. With a mix of weather reports, news from the Sherriff’s office, mysterious sky-sightings, and more, the show can zig-zag from funny to a little spooky, but is always entertaining. Don’t listen after dark if you believe in ghosts, but do check this one out. www.welcometonightvale.com

4. Stuff You Missed in History Class

Genre: historical

Run by two seriously cool women, Tracy Wilson and Holly Frey, Stuff You Missed in History Class is just that: it’s what the history books don’t want you to know. Whether you consider yourself a history buff or just want to listen to some neat stories, this podcast will do the trick. It includes brief histories of peanut butter, harmonicas, moonshine, the Eggnog Riots, and, of course, lots and lots of scandalous affairs. www.missedinhistory.com

5. Modern Love

Genre: nonfiction

For years a famed New York Times column, Modern Love is going digital in this new podcast, which features familiar talents reading columns submitted by readers, writers, and lovers from all over. The stories deal with relationships, good and bad, poignant and funny, and, most often, quite moving. 

6. Second Captains

Genre: sports broadcasting

Perfect for keeping up with sports on the go, Second Captains is run by Eoin McDevitt, Ken Early, Ciaran Murphy, Simon Hick, and Mark Horgan. The popular podcast is out four times a week so you’re always on top of the news, and features interviews with athletes from all different sports, though there is one on just football as well. www.irishtimes.com/sport/second-captains

7. This American Life

Genre: nonfiction

This American Life is a blend of all kinds of storytelling and is truly a fascinating listen. There’s usually one theme per episode, and that theme is then explored through true stories told by ordinary people—at times funny, informative, heartbreaking, and always complex. Some popular themes from past podcasts have included babysitting, summer camp, immigration, and babies who have been switched at birth—a wide variety, with plenty for all. www.thisamericanlife.org

8. Stuff You Should Know

Genre: informative

Similar to Stuff You Missed in History Class, Stuff You Should Know features… stuff you should know. The show is hosted by Josh Clark and Chuck Bryant, and part of what makes this podcast so good is that they’re not experts on anything, instead just exploring whatever topics they can get their hands on. Some of the biggest hits have been episodes on Spam, pinball machines, death, hangovers, cheese, and Jack the Ripper. With such a wide variety of topics, there’s bound to be something you’re intrigued by. www.stuffyoushouldknow.com/podcasts

9. Song Exploder

Genre: music

Song Exploder is a musical podcast, but it doesn’t just play music. Each episode features an artist from nearly any genre (pop, hardcore punk, even television theme song writers), who discusses how and why the song was written. This podcast could help you find your new favorite artist, give you insight into how much goes into making a song, and is a fascinating look at the creative process as well. www.songexploder.net

10. Sleep With Me

Genre: mood

Sleep With Me is a hidden gem of a podcast and is perfect for people who have insomnia or trouble falling asleep. Just like the name implies, Sleep With Me will actually…just bore you to sleep. The show features nonsensical and boring monologues from the creator, Drew Ackerman, but he won’t get offended if you fall asleep while he’s talking. That’s the point. www.sleepwithmepodcast.com

Happy listening! 

We are currently looking for young people between the ages of 16 and 25 across the country to join our Action Panels and support young people across Ireland. Find our more about joining the SpunOut.ie Action Panel.

I became involved with SpunOut through a recommendation. During my third year in secondary school I suffered from intense panic attacks and anxiety about the Junior Cert. I know there was no need for it but in my defense it was the first time anyone in my family sat State Examinations this century. I was having a really bad time trying to juggle school, friends, family and hobbies. I couldn’t handle the stress of everything and because of that everything in my life suffered.

One of my teachers noticed I was on the verge of a mental breakdown and told me to look up SpunOut and read some articles about anxiety. I had never heard of SpunOut up until that point. I can vividly remember the first time I looked up SpunOut and realised that I wasn’t alone. There were accounts from people going through similar situations to me. I then realised that I should talk to someone about my stress. Thanks to SpunOut I got help from professionals and was diagnosed with anxiety and depression.

I had been an advocate reader of SpunOut from that point forward. During the summer of 2015 I saw an article that said SpunOut were looking for new Action Panel members. I applied straightaway thinking there was no harm in applying. To say I was shocked to find out I had been accepted is an understatement.

Since I’ve been on the Action Panel there’s been three Action Panel Meetings. During that time SpunOut turned 10 and there was an event at Facebook HQ to celebrate that. Currently the Action Panel are talking about hosting an event with workshops and talks for a day. I’ve only been on the Action Panel for five months but I’m thoroughly enjoying my time at SpunOut and hope to spend years more with them. I have met some amazing people who come from all around the country that I would never have previously had a chance to meet.

The topics that I have a keen interest in are mental health(obviously) and education. I believe that mental health for young people in Ireland is still quite a taboo topic. There is a lot of information and help out there but young people are having trouble finding it. The work SpunOut are doing regarding mental health is definitely a step in the right direction. I also believe that the education system in this country needs improvements. The new points system is one area I feel needs serious reforming. I hope that by working on the Action Panel this issues can be addressed even more so than they are now.

The Action Panel also offer their services to SpunOut when it comes to relevant campaigns, members contribute articles, they proof read content and they generally offer criticism and suggest ways of improving content. We give our input because as young people we are the targeted audience for SpunOut.

Read more  about the SpunOut Action Panel and who is on it.

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SpunOut.ie Action Panels advise SpunOut on the key topics that impact young people in their area. SpunOut.ie’s core approach is “by young people, for young people” and the Action Panels are integral in providing direction on the information needs of young people from each region and in generating solutions for these needs. The Action Panels aim to engage and facilitate young people’s voices.

To learn more about the Action Panel and how you can apply for the panel, visit our Action Panel application page.

If you’re interested in volunteering with SpunOut.ie but the Action Panel is not your thing, check out our other volunteering options here.

All my life, ever since I remember I had these feeling inside of me that I didn’t belong and that I didn’t fit in with what was around me. I spent my childhood and teenage years feeling lonely. These feelings worsened when my dad died. He had been trying to get me to come out of myself before he passed, and to show me how to become a man.

Once he was gone I was lost, with no one to guide me or to say “Hey everything will be alright, and you’ll be alright”. I felt as if I was in a pit that I would never escape from, yet somehow I thought that this was all normal. I believed that the way I felt as a kid was how everyone felt, but that people around me where able to deal with it but I wasn’t. It would take until I was 20 for me to reach my breaking point and for me to ask for help. It was then I finally found out what was wrong with me all my life, I had depression and anxiety.

I made the decision to finally seek out a doctor as it had come to the stage where I wasn’t sleeping at all. I would be awake each night with cold sweat pouring over me, worrying about the smallest of things and questioning my very reason to be alive. I told my mother and sister that I couldn’t take it anymore so I went to my local doctor. I was extremely nervous and anxious to see them and to talk about myself as I thought I was the only one in the world who was this way and that they would consider me a freak and try and lock me up. However the feeling of comfort and understanding I got when I told my doctor how I felt and when she replied “Don’t worry you’re not alone. We can get you help, this is far more common than you know”. In that moment I knew I had a chance of beating this, that I wasn’t the only person in the world this way, that I finally had hope.

I was referred to Mallow Primary Healthcare Centre where I was asked about what was wrong. After a meeting I was told I would be put on medication and that I would be given counselling sessions to discuss my problems and to get to the root of them.

The first day I went for a therapy session I kept myself closed off. Over a few more sessions I began to let my guard down and began to discuss things that I had kept bottled up within myself for so long. There was no judging or ridiculing me, it was simple a place of help and understanding of what was going on within me. After a year of therapy I made the decision that I felt comfortable enough to leave and face the world alone, which proved to be a mistake.

Towards the second half of 2014 I began to feel myself slipping again, that something wasn’t quite right with me. Then on the 10th of December I completely shut down and wanted to end my life. I immediately contacted all my doctors and said I felt horrible and the response was quick and literally lifesaving. I was seen the next day by my local doctor and was taken back onto my therapy sessions the following week, I struggled to get through Christmas. I began to take things a day at a time and found myself feeling better than ever. The support around me lifted me up and I found the strength within myself to say I’m happy. It was then I decided to make the video below to help others because as hard as it is to get through depression, it is possible and I hope somehow this will help anyone on their journey.

Check out Timothy's short film on his depression below

Anyone who is eligible to vote should have the opportunity to have their say on polling day. For those with disabilities, there can be extra challenges involved in being able to access a polling station or in casting their vote. 

There are a number of supports in palce for those who might have trouble with accessibility. 

Alternative Polling Stations

For use if you:

How you do it:

Companion Voting

For use if you:

How you do it:

Voting by Post

For use if you:

How you do it:

Find out more about applying for the postal voters list here.

Voting in a Nursing Home or Hospital

For use if you:

How you do it:

Other things to note:

Returning officers at your local polling station must make available a table and chair for electors who may find the polling booth unsuitable

It is also the duty of the returning officer to make known which polling stations in his or her constituency are not accessible for those with disabilities (although steps are taken to ensure that this is the case as little as possible)

Happy voting!

So the Christmas festivities have come and gone. The long, antagonising list of New Year's resolutions are stuck on the door of the fridge, a complicated recipe of how to live a better life; a subtle reminder. January is now over, and the same list watches over us, haunting us as we make our daily life choices. One thing I have learned about people is that although we bear individuality and differences, at the end of the day, we are all the same. The common guidelines on how to live a better life will include; eat healthier, exercise regularly, get more sleep, get more fresh air, cut down on alcohol, quit smoking, save more money, and so the long monotonic list continues. Now, I am not saying these are not on my list of New Year's resolutions, as they are. But, this year, I have decided my top priority, my main goal, my target for the New Year is a simple one. I am going to love myself.

I got my inspiration from the current Justin Bieber song “Love Yourself”. When I heard the opening lines “For all the times that you rained on my parade”, it made me think about all the people that rained on my parade in 2015. All the people that brought me down; made me feel worse for wear and deflated at times. There were not too many people like this, but in our day to day lives; at work, at home, we meet people that drag us down, drain us. Be it a negative comment or a taken opportunity to say one thing that will put a damper on our day. As the song proceeds, “all the times you told me my opinion is wrong”, I thought of the times in 2015 that I was put down or knocked down in some cases. Being shy by nature, I thought of the times I made opinions/statements in certain company, to which I was corrected, re-informed or simply told I was wrong. I listened to the line “and I didn’t wanna write a song”, to which I thought of myself. I don’t want to confront people. I don’t want to bring conflict into my life, although sometimes conflict and agro are difficult to avoid. Sometimes, life gives you no option but to express how you feel, ask the questions you don’t want to ask and hear the answers you are not expecting. Even at times when “I be movin’ on”, I am brought back to cyclic scenario again and again, making the move forward almost impossible.

What I have learned most from Biebs, is that when people treat you in a certain way, an undeserving way, rather than becoming bogged down in their insensitivity and lack of consideration, the best solution is to have a positive attitude. These people need to bring others down, in order to pick themselves up. To make them feel better about themselves and their circumstances. So this year is where I draw the line. No longer will I allow myself to be bothered by people and the things they say. From now on, I will follow in the words of Justin Bieber “love yourself”. Yes, I will concern myself and conserve my energy, for me. This year will be the year that I focus on improving myself. I will gain self respect and further self worth. Low self esteem and mental health go hand in hand together. Low self esteem makes individuals susceptible to develop psychiatric conditions; such as depressive disorders, eating disorders and substance abuse disorders. The occurrence of these disorders lowers self esteem, even further. Personal mental health is something each of us should give priority to. Personal mental health guides you towards happiness and success. Focusing on my personal mental health for the new year is my top priority.

I intend to do this by;

  1. Smiling and laughing more
  2. Don’t take myself or life more seriously
  3. Realising if I fail, it is not the end of the world
  4. Walk as much as I can, for exercise but also for fresh air
  5. Dream new possibilities
  6. Reflect on my successes and believe in myself
  7. Do things I love as often as possible
  8. Welcome new challenges and experiences, rather than run away from them.
  9. Focus on what is good in my life, rather than what is going wrong

I hope that starting this year, I will be more content in my own skin, happier with my own conscious and confident in my decisions. I will think independently and try my utmost best to not let others control my life. We all get one life, with that one opportunity to make the best of it. We will not reach true happiness if we let others dictate our mood and how we feel. I am going to love myself. To all those who try to bring me down, you should love yourself too.

Everyone at one time or another has made a friend, lost a friend, or kept a friend for years.  A friend is someone who makes you laugh, gives you a shoulder to cry on, and helps you get through different phases of your life.

We’ve all read the so-called ‘listicles’ about “17 Reasons Your BFF is your Absolute BFF”, but nobody ever talks about what to do when a friendship (old or new) starts to become toxic. Toxic is a scary word, but it’s very appropriate in the case of someone who is making your life more difficult. 

Have you ever had a friend, even one of your closest, that made you feel really bad about yourself? Constantly put you down, subtly told you that you needed to change to suit others, made you feel like a second option and put you last, or made little of things you loved? 

In my fourteen years of school, I’ve experienced my fair share of objectively crappy friends. And instead of making you go through the ups and downs, the melodramatic fights and make ups, and the ocean of tears, I’m going to help you out with a few simple pieces of advice.

  1. Talk to them. If this person is a friend worth having, having a mature conversation about how you feel should clear things up, and make them realise what they’ve been doing. 
  2. If it continues even after a chat about how you feel, it’s time to evaluate your friendship. Is it worth having your feelings hurt on a daily basis to keep this person around?
  3. The answer is no. They might be your oldest friend, but that doesn’t mean they’re a good friend, or a friend that you have to stay with despite them being crappy human beings.
  4. If they’re always being mean, constantly belittling you and not supporting you in life at all then it’s time to cut them out of your life. The ‘cutting out’ of a friend sounds really harsh but sometimes, it’s what you need to do. Yes, it’s hard and very sad, especially if you two go way back, but if your self-esteem or mental well-being is at risk then it’s definitely for the best. 
  5. If you do decide to cut someone out of your life, remember to be mature, as it will only reflect badly on you. It’s important to maintain respect for someone, even if they don’t do the same.

It all seems so simple when you write it down, but know that it’s going to be difficult, and you’re probably going to make a few mistakes along the way. Just try and remember that you are not a bad person for wanting to have positive people around you. 

It starts with text from a friend, letting you know someone’s grandparent has passed. Your heart sinks a bit with the sympathy you feel for whoever has lost them. You go to the funeral but can’t help feeling out of place. You never knew the person the prayers are being said for or the reason why a poem was read in lieu of a eulogy. For you, this loss is merely a moment of sadness for your friend. A thought, perhaps, of your own grandparents and how they too are inching ever closer to eternal silence. But after this second passes, normality is restored and the world goes on. Your life is shaken for a brief minute but the vase hasn’t yet fallen off the mantelpiece.

Until it happens to you. And the vase tumbles down and is shattered.

For a lot of people, myself included, the loss of grandparents is significant. For my eighteen years, I had seen mine every Sunday. I knew, of course, they would not be around forever. My nan died in February, before my last mock exam, after several on/off weeks in hospital since the previous September. Her chronic illnesses and mentality had confined her to the house for years. She was usually stubborn, however her passing anything but. She was simply talking away to a patient in the bed beside her when she just slipped away from this world. It was peaceful and just. My grandad too was spending time in hospital during this period. When I opened the door to their vacant home a few days later, I had never experienced an emptiness like it. My nan’s spirit had fled, it did not linger or gradually fade away, it had just vanished.

After midterm break, when all my friends had spent a week celebrating the end of mocks, my life wasn’t even slightly normal again. My grandad was still sick. My sister was moving to England. I was trying not to fall apart. My parents begged me to focus on my studies. And I tried, but in those lonely hours, sitting cooped up in my room, I could not help but wonder about my grandad and when he would leave us. Weeks passed, I turned eighteen, had my graduation and last day in school, but there was always an unsaid darkness lingering over it all. And then one night, a week before my Leaving Cert, he inhaled and never exhaled again. It was over.

And so we went through the routine we had done just a hundred days previous. We met family, reminisced about old times, and said goodbye to him. But once again, it was time to study, given the week it was. I had a ready-made excuse not to talk to my friends for weeks and be alone. Everything in my life had changed, or would soon change, and I no longer recognised who I was. No matter how much I tried to explain, few people understood the strength it took to keep powering through. I did not have a time to grieve. Everyone else was preoccupied with exams, while I was just questioning the significance of them with everything else that had happened. In a time of such upheaval in my life, I did not want to study maths or biology or any of my other subjects. But I had no option.

I finally understood how it felt to lose a grandparent. It must’ve seemed crazy to be so upset by it to those who haven’t gone through it. It’s inevitable, sure, but that does not make it less painful. For me, they were the first family members I was truly close with who had passed away when I was at an age to fully comprehend what their deaths meant. It felt like someone had stabbed me in the chest, knocked the wind out of me and put me the Hunger Games arena. My Leaving Cert wasn’t going to wait for me to be ready. I had to move on quicker than I wanted to. It was the worst timing in the world.

No one wants to acknowledge death. It’s uncomfortable, sad and scary. It’s easier to leave it hidden in the dark branches of your mind. But you need to purge it out. You need to share the beautiful memories you have of that person and take them in your stride every day. However the truth is, you will never understand a person’s grief until it happens to you. And so, instead of turning to your friends for sympathy, try turning inwards. Smile and cry and fall apart. Your life becomes a jigsaw to be pieced back together, but when it is, you will be stronger than ever.

Relationships are difficult, especially when you’re young, in college and barely know who you are, so I never really understood the appeal. College is, to be cliché, about creating yourself. It’s about finding the people you can talk to forever and indulging in the different personalities you will come to meet. College is also about trying new things, studying hard and seizing opportunities. And so, I’ve come to realise that being single in college may not be the worst thing.

My friends complain about wanting a boyfriend, when a lot of guys in first year of college want the complete opposite to a serious relationship. Meeting someone in a nightclub will rarely lead to a relationship. Guys you meet in nightclubs want one thing only, and I think we all know what that is. Half of college is about having fun and new experiences, and you don’t need the safety blanket of a relationship you don’t want to be in.

I think a lot people want to be in a relationship so they can feel good about themselves. Particularly in an era of social media, young adults these days are more prone than ever to self-critical analysis. Of course it would be nice to feel wanted and to tell someone all the stupid details of your life, but relationships will only make you feel good if you actually want to be with that person.

Getting a boyfriend/girlfriend should not be the main goal in your youthful life. You need to focus on what you love to do and become successful in that. When you begin to work on yourself and who you are, you will become so engrossed in your own life that maybe you will unexpectedly gravitate towards someone you really love. There are so many exciting aspects of college to preoccupy you and discover parts of yourself you never even knew existed, you don’t need to hold someone’s hand while doing this.

You need this critical time to grow and learn by yourself. Going on crazy adventures with your friends, and living for the nights that you will never forget, should be the moments you strive for.  Focusing on becoming the “right person”, rather than searching for them, sounds like a better use of time to me. You shouldn’t settle for anyone, especially when you’re only twenty years old in the middle of college. Prioritise yourself instead of the wrong person. You don't need anyone else to justify your existence, you can do that on your own.

Let’s face it, most relationships in college aren’t going to last forever and they have a sell-by date. I would highly recommend discovering who you are, seeking out new opportunities, and believing that someone will stumble into your life when the time is right. Some people hate the idea of being single, others relish in it. The point is, it’s okay. Being single shouldn’t be some sort of sad social label, it should be something to rejoice in. You can become a strong, independent person and, most of all, free for the most interesting and bizarre years of your life.

There are so many boring things in life, do not let your romantic relationship be one of them. Respect yourself enough to be with someone because you love them, not just because you’re afraid of being alone. Being single in college is more than okay, it’s liberating.

This content originally appeared on Ryan’s blog ‘Endorhpin Stew’. You can read more great content at endorphinstew.com.

Fresh into my third week of meal prep, I already feel like I’m getting a hold on my old mindless spending habits, while also opening my mind to more recipe ideas that are both affordable and handy to have on the go.

Most importantly, though, I feel the recipes I’ve been experimenting with have been coming out even more delicious than the meals I was used to buying out and about before…hopefully it’s not just me who thinks so, however!

If anything on the list strikes you as something you’d like to try, go for it! And don’t forget to tell me how it goes by tagging your Instagram/Twitter posts with #endorphinstew. 

Smoothie: chia seed yogurt and berries (4 servings)

Ingredients

Instructions 

  1. On the evening before you make the smoothies, mix the natural yogurt and chia seeds in well together. Pour the mixture into the base of four regular sized cups or jars. This allows the chia seeds to absorb the yogurt and expand overnight.
  2. The next day, add into a high powered blended, the bag of frozen blueberries, half a cup of almond milk and one banana. Blend until you form a thickish mixture and divide it between two of the cups already containing yogurt. Garnish the top with some of your fresh fruit.
  3. Repeat the process for the last two yogurt cups, this time using your bag of mixed berries, banana and almond milk.

Green purée and meatballs (3 servings)

Ingredients 

For the meatballs:

For the green purée:

Instructions

  1. Into a large saucepan, add your pasta, barely cover it with boiling water from your kettle and place over a medium heat. Stir frequently and drain when all pasta is soft and tender. Leave aside for now.
  2. Add all of the meatball ingredients to a mixing bowl. Using a spoon or thoroughly washed hands, mix everything together very well and then roll the mixture into equal-sized balls. Leave them all on a side plate for now.
  3. Drizzle a little rapeseed oil onto a large sized pan. When the oil is hot, place your meatballs onto it, cover with a lid and bring down to a low heat.
  4. Turn your meatballs every three minutes and keep an eye on them until they’re all fully cooked throughout. Place aside.
  5. To make your purée, boil your frozen peas and spinach together in a saucepan of hot water until they’re tender or microwave for approx. five minutes on a high power.
  6. Place all ingredients for the green purée into a hand blender and blend well. Heat on a frying pan if you’re having it immediately, or else pour it onto your meatballs and pasta in a storage container, place it into the fridge or freezer and microwave before you consume.

Strawberry and Golgi berry protein bars (3 servings)

Ingredients

Instructions

  1. Preheat the oven at 180 degrees Celsius.
  2. Add all of the above ingredients into a mixing bowl. Making sure to thoroughly wash hands, mix it all right in together. It will be a dry mixture, but if beating it together becomes too hard, add more almond milk.
  3. When the mixture is well bound, break it up into 3 blobs and shape into bars.
  4. Place the three bars onto a baking tray lined with baking paper and bake for 8 mins, or until the outer surface of the bars is golden brown.

Aubergine lasagne (4 servings)

Ingredients 

For the lasagne:

For the cheese sauce:

Instructions

  1. Preheat the oven at 180 degrees Celsius.
  2. Slice the aubergines into even, as close to paper-like portions as possible. Salt each slice on each side and place all, as loosely as possible onto a large sieve and leave the salt to extract the moisture for approx. 1 hour.
  3. After this time, dab both sides of each slice with some kitchen paper to dry.
  4. While you’re left waiting, chop up all your veggies and sautée them in some rapeseed oil until they’re all tender. Place aside when ready.
  5. Cook off your mince, add in the veggies along with the bay leaves (remember to take them out) and your tomato passata. Leave on a low heat and allow to cook through.
  6. Wipe the inside of 2 medium sized lasagne bowls with some rapeseed oil, and then layer the bottom with some aubergine.
  7. Place your mince and sauce over the aubergine, line with aubergine, add more sauce and line the outer layer of aubergine with a small amount of sauce.
  8. Bake for about ten mins.
  9. During the ten mins, make your cheese sauce by adding the above ingredients to a small frying pan, mix until melted, add to the top layer of the lasagne after its ten mins of baking and then place back into the oven for another five mins approx.

Berry and seed mix (2 servings)

Ingredients 

These seed mixes have become an addiction of mine and they’re perfectly appetising the way they were. I said I’d mix it up a little this week, nonetheless. ?

Salmon with fresh red pepper sauce (3 servings)

Ingredients 

For the red pepper sauce:

Instructions

  1. Preheat the oven to 180 degrees Celsius.
  2. Sautée your chopped red peppers with the baby tomatoes until they become tender, place them into a hand blender with the rest of your ingredients and blitz. That’s as easy as making your delicious sauce goes.
  3. Either boil your green beans in a saucepan of hot water or place directly into a microwave from the freezer for approx. five mins on high power.
  4. Loosely wrap your salmon fillets into some tinfoil and bake for approx. 30 mins.
  5. Into a large saucepan, add your pasta, barely cover with boiling water from your kettle and place over a medium heat. Stir frequently and drain when all pasta is soft and tender. Leave aside for now.
  6. All you need to do is place the lot into a lunch box, seal it and enjoy it later on in the week if not straight away. 

As always, thanks very much for checking out this post today ? 

Until the next post,

Happy healthy eating,

Ryan. ?

Polyamory is engaging with more than one person in a romantic and or sexual way. Poly means many and amor means love. Many loves! No, it isn’t an excuse to cheat on your partner! The foundation of a poly relationship, as it is with all relationships is clear communication between all persons involved. There are no secrets, everything is clearly out on the table and everyone knows what is going on.

So if a Polyamorous relationship is having more than one partner, what is a “normal” relationship? Monogamy: is a form of relationship where a person only has one partner throughout their lifetime or at any given time.

We are nearly all accustomed to our strictly monogamous society. We see relationships involving only two people at one time. That is what we’ve come to see as normal. If someone has feelings for another person other than their partner they are seen as unfaithful. Which can be very hurtful and confusing for anyone who may have feelings for two different people leaving them to feel torn.

It is a fact that only between 3% and 5% of 5,000 species of mammals, including humans, form monogamous bonds. So I guess it’s not as normal as we perceived, huh?

I identify as a polyamorous person, so what does that mean exactly? It means that I can be romantically and or sexually attracted to more than one person at a time, which I can confirm has happened more than once in my life time. “But it’s not the same! You cannot love two people equally” You’re right, it’s not the same. No two people are the same so why would I love them both the same? Up until a few weeks ago I was in a homosexual relationship.

Before asking this person to be my girlfriend I made sure she knew that I identified as polyamorous and asked if she would be okay with an open relationship. All was well until she realised that no, she was not okay with it, which was perfectly fine. Knowing that neither of us were going to be 100% happy with our relationship we ended on good terms. During our relationship I made it known that I had developed feelings for another person but didn’t act on them because I knew this person was strictly monogamous. So you may claim that I was unfaithful in my relationship, but I am only human and no one ever has full control over who they develop romantic feelings for.

And yes while monogamous relationships seem awfully romantic, I know that I am just not one of those people. No I do not have commitment issues, nor am I a greedy bisexual or sex addict. I am poly. I want to share my heart, and my love with as many people as possible. Coming to the realization of this has honestly been one of the most difficult life experiences for me. So I hope I helped someone who may be going through something similar to what I went through or even if I helped you learn something new. There is loads of information out there, so in the words of sexologist Lindsey Doe (who has a youtube channel you should check out called: Sexplanations): “Stay Curious!”

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