Recently, myself and some other SpunOut.ie volunteers were inspired by fundraising stories we heard from our fellow volunteers, and decided that we wanted to run a fundraiser for SpunOut.ie. I came up with the idea of shaving my head as something I could do from home that would hopefully encourage people to donate. I got in touch with some other SpunOut.ie volunteers and together we decided to start a Shave or Dye in aid of SpunOut.ie. Since we couldn’t do it in person, we decided to all record ourselves in a style similar to that of a vlog and post it on our social media pages to get the attention of friends and family who may not know a lot about SpunOut.ie.

Why we chose SpunOut.ie

We chose to fundraise for SpunOut because it’s an organisation that’s very close to our hearts. Whether we’ve been volunteering for a few months or several years, we’ve all seen the amazing work done by SpunOut.ie and the fantastic opportunities provided to volunteers. We wanted to give back and we felt that by fundraising, we were getting SpunOut.ie’s name out to our friends and families, while also raising vital funds.

Useful resource for us all

Most, if not all of us, have used SpunOut.ie to get answers about questions we may have or to learn about the experiences of other people our age. Having the ability to get factual, up-to-date and easy to understand information on a wide range of topics is extremely important for young people. SpunOut is such a valuable resource for young people in Ireland. We want to make sure that any young person that may want to access SpunOut.ie for whatever reason knows it exists and where to find it.

Shave or Dye

We chose a Shave or Dye fundraiser as it’s one of the most accessible fundraisers while we’re all apart. Hair dye comes in a range of prices, with semi-permanent and permanent variants and anyone shaving their head just needs a trimmer to get started. Despite its relative simplicity, it’s a fundraiser that people always enjoy. We tend to really like seeing people do extreme things to their hair for charity. 

Afterwards you tend to get lots of people commenting or asking about your hair, which can lead naturally into a conversation about why you did it and who you did it for. In this way, this type of fundraiser lives on long passed the day you actually shave/dye your hair. In a similar way, with us all posting pictures and videos online, we all have the chance to talk about SpunOut.ie in a way that can grab the attention of those who normally wouldn’t see it. In other words, our friends and families can watch us do extreme things to hair, while also learning about a fantastic organisation.

How can I get involved? 

If you want to support our fundraising campaign and the work of SpunOut.ie, any donation is greatly appreciated. You can donate here. 

We’ll be sharing our videos online and across SpunOut.ie’s social media so keep an eye out for us on Saturday 16th May. 

College students have said they have been forgotten about and left behind during the COVID-19 (Coronavirus) pandemic.

Since campuses closed across the country in March, college students feel they have been put under an unreasonable amount of pressure to complete assignments and exams, and they have received no support from the Government or Higher Education Institutions (HEIs).

How college students have been affected by COVID-19

We asked college students to share their experiences since this crisis began. These are some of the most common issues that came up:

Difficulties with online learning

Online learning can be challenging, especially for students who are used to having lectures and tutorials in person. Not all students have the space they need to be able to focus on their work, and they could have other responsibilities. Another challenge is that the way classes are delivered can vary from one lecturer or department to the next, meaning students have to adapt to a new way of learning for each class.

In other cases, some students were receiving no online support at all. “In my college, depending on what course you’re doing, you either had online classes from day one, constant communication with lecturers and a dialogue about how best to proceed, or you had no classes, you were told to teach yourself and you’ve had several new assignments added with little time to complete them and no leeway,” said college student, Mike Edgar. Chloe Boland, a language student, has received no support or online classes from her department in the final few weeks of the term. “It’s kind of impossible to teach a language to yourself at home,” she says.

Natasha Sutton, a student from Co. Cork, said that while her lecturers did their best to support students online, “they all had different ways of doing so, such as through Google Meets, Canvas Discussion Boards, etc. I believe it would have worked better if each adopted a similar approach rather than having to access different apps for different lecturers.”

Unrealistic workloads

Students feel that colleges and departments are putting too much pressure on them to complete assignments and exams before the end of the year. Because the traditional end-of-year exams have been cancelled, it is up to each department and/or lecturer to decide how to replace them. For many students, this means more assignments or online exams which need to be completed in a very short space of time.

Niamh Quinn, a law student at Maynooth University, said “I was given 16 essays ranging from 2,500 words to 7,000 words, to complete in 4-5 weeks,” the equivalent of a PhD thesis which normally takes 4 years to write. In addition to this, she has received no slides or notes from some lecturers, and she is worried she could miss out on a place for a Masters degree if she has to repeat any exams. This could come with a cost of €9500, as she would need to pay her fees to secure a place next year instead.

Digital divide

With many students forced to return to their family homes during this pandemic, access to technology or a reliable internet connection can be limited for some. Students in rural areas are finding it hard to engage with online classes or submit assignments on time because their wifi or data is so unreliable. “My internet here in the countryside is very unreliable. I had to email my lecturers countless times to inform them that my internet cut off midway through live zoom calls or just before it – causing me to miss valuable information and possibly affecting my attendance grades,” shared Lauren Maunsell, a 19 year old student in Tipperary.

Not all students even have access to the technology they need to engage with classes. Criodán Ó Murchú, a 22 year old student at NUI Galway, said one of his classmates had to share one laptop between four people in her family, one of whom was a medical student, so that they could all take part in exams on the same day.

Another student, Mair Kelly, age 21 and from Cork, said “I was lucky to be loaned a laptop thanks to the SU, without that I would not have been able to complete exams and would have had to wait and see whether we would even have repeats in August.”

Lack of financial support

Many students around the country are supporting themselves through college. With job losses and business closures, students are concerned that they may not be able to get work during the summer to save for the next college year.

Niamh Quinn, the law student in Maynooth, said she took a break from work during her final year to focus on her studies, which meant she wasn’t eligible for the Pandemic Unemployment Payment. “I have unfortunately run out of the savings that were keeping me afloat, yet am still paying rent and bills in a house that I have not lived in for 2 months. I have had to take a loan out to cover this” she said, a situation that many students across the country are facing.

Missing out on college life and important milestones

For many students, college is an exciting time and an important phase in their life. Being forced to leave the campus means they are now missing out on college experiences. Lauren Maunsell, a 19 year old student from Tipperary, had just put herself forward for Social Sciences College Officer in the UCD Students’ Union when things were ground to a halt. She was looking forward to taking part in a traditional campaign by speaking to students and putting up posters, but this was all moved online instead. But aside from that, what she’s missing is the experience of being in college surrounded by other students. “I miss the interactiveness of the lectures and seminars. I miss the chats with my friends and grabbing lunch with them.”

Students in final year feel like they have been robbed of the opportunity to mark the end of this part of their life. “I did a PLC after I left school, and am now about to finish a 4 year degree, so I’ve been in college for 5 years really, and everything it has been building up to has ended quite suddenly and abruptly,” said Róisín Murphy, a 23 year old student from Mayo. Students attended their final lectures on campus, without realising they wouldn’t be returning again.

Students want support

It is clear that students want support and recognition from the Department of Education and the Higher Education Institutions (HEIs) to help them through this crisis. They have been put under a lot of pressure in recent months, and they are worried about the impact it will have on their degrees, as well as their mental health.

Want to share your experience as a college student during the COVID-19 pandemic? Write about it for SpunOut.ie.

Read more testimonials form college students on how they have been impacted by COVID-19.

Read opinion pieces from young people on this subject:

View our Wellbeing Guide for College Students here.

Feeling overwhelmed or anxious around the current pandemic?

The Ireland Young Filmmaker of the Year Awards took place on May 13th on Fresh Film Festival’s YouTube channel due to the current COVID-19 (Coronavirus) restrictions. The awards were hosted by Demi Isaac Oviawe who stars in ‘The Young Offenders’.

What is Fresh International Film Festival?

Fresh International Film Festival is an opportunity for young people from Ireland and overseas, aged 7 to 18 years, to create, exhibit and share films. The festival gives young filmmakers the chance to have their work seen on a cinema screen for the first time and to compete for the title of Ireland’s Young Filmmaker of the Year.

The 2020 winners

In addition to Ireland’s Young Filmmaker of the Year, awards included Second Place, Third Place, and Highly Commended and other Specialist Awards.

Ireland’s Young Filmmaker of the Year 2020

The winner of this year’s competition was Cal O’ Driscoll (17) from Dublin for his film ‘Pirates’, which is about a pirate station in Ireland in the 1980’s. Following his win Cal said “It was an absolute honor to win Ireland’s Young Filmmaker of the Year. This year was different to any final I have ever experienced as the Finals took place online due to the current Covid-19 situation. I watched the awards with my cast and crew on a group zoom call and Fresh Film still managed to maintain the excitement and magic of the Festival this year like they have done every other year. I am so thankful to receive this award as there was so many other films that deserved it also.”

Second Place

Oisin McKeogh (18) from Clare took second place with his film ‘Midsummer Beauty’ about a girl who struggles with a crush on one of her best friends. He said “it’s my fifth year entering Fresh International Film Festival. I have grown as a person and a filmmaker with this Festival. I am honoured to have won this award surrounded by such a talented group of filmmakers.”

Third Place

Third place went to Milosh Hughes (18) from Dublin for his film ‘Synthasia’, which is described as a dystopian technological fantasy.

Highly Commended

Highly Commended Awards were won by Sean Treacy from Wicklow for Direction for his film ‘Broken Reflection’, Max Hendrickson from Dublin for Concept for his film ‘Enkata’, and Josh Lynas from Down for Storytelling with his film ‘Lost in Transit’.

Best Group and Best School

Prizes for Best group went to Molly Hoque and Kildare Young Filmmakers with their film ‘Witch Hunt’, and Alexandra College in Dublin took the prize for Best School, with their film ‘Four’, directed by Ella Nethercott.

Audience and International Film Awards

The Audience Award winner, which was voted for online, was awarded to Michael Keane (16) from Cork for his film ‘Final Shot’ based on the Columbine school shootings in the USA. The International Film Award went to Emmanuel Li from the UK for his film ‘Have You Seen Buster?’ about a spirited, determined 12 year old named Jacob who embarks on a search for his missing dog Buster.

Jayne Foley, Director of Fresh International Film Festival, commented that the standard of this year’s competition was really high and said “Next year will be our 25th anniversary and in setting up Fresh in 1997 we were looking to create those shared moments. We loved cinema and we wanted to create a community of young film-makers who would bond over screenings at a Festival. The Ireland’s Young Filmmaker of the Year competition meant that the films screened and stories told would be their own. Video was king then, and we watched as video cassettes dropped through our letterbox from all over the country. And they’ve continued coming, on shiny discs, memory sticks and links now from Ireland and across the world. We have come a long way and so have our young filmmakers and I congratulate each and every one of them. Thanks to them the future of filmmaking is bright!”

The Junior Finals will air at 4pm on May 20th, on Fresh Film Festival’s YouTube channel. See www.freshfilmfestival.com for more info.

A group of 5th year students have started a campaign on Instagram to share their concerns about the Leaving Cert 2021 exams. They say the closing of schools has greatly impacted their classes, and there are concerns that there will not be enough time to finish the two-year curriculum by the time the exams are due to begin next year.

Many of the challenges facing 6th year students this year also apply to 5th year students. Although Leaving Cert 2020 has been cancelled and replaced with a calculated grades system, there are no plans to carry that system over to next year, which means the Leaving Cert will go ahead as normal.

Problems facing 5th years in the COVID-19 crisis

We asked 5th year students how they are feeling about the impact the pandemic has had on their schoolwork, and what it will mean for the Leaving Cert next year.

These are some of the main issues that came up.

Learning from home

Students have said that the way their classes are being delivered is very different from one school to the next. Some schools are providing video classes while others are getting little support from their school.

All of the students said that trying to learn at home, whether that’s by teaching yourself or taking part in online learning, has been difficult and they feel like they’ve fallen behind. For students in smaller or crowded homes, finding a space to do their work in can be a challenge, and home is not always the safest environment to be in. This makes it very difficult to focus on study.

Falling behind on coursework

The curriculum for the Leaving Cert is spread across two years, which means 5th year is just as important as 6th year in preparing for the Leaving Cert exams. Some of the course content can take longer to get through than others, and students are concerned about the amount of class time they have lost since the beginning of this crisis. Many students are worried that they won’t be able to finish the full course before the Leaving Cert starts next year, which could put them at a disadvantage.

Mental health concerns

Students who were already dealing with mental health issues are finding that the stress surrounding the crisis and their schoolwork has made some of these issues worse. Other students who might not have been struggling with their mental health before this crisis are now experiencing feelings of stress, worry, and anxiety, which is having a negative impact on their mental health.

Increased competition for courses

Some students are concerned that the number of people taking the exams next year could increase if current 6th year students decide they want to re-take their exams or repeat the year entirely. This could increase the demand for college courses in September 2021, which means the points for those courses could go up.

Given that many students feel they have fallen behind on their coursework, the idea of increased points is causing a lot of stress and anxiety.

5th year students want a response

Many students understand why the 6th year group were prioritised in the initial response to this crisis. However, now that the Department of Education has found a solution to Leaving Cert 2020, 5th years are calling for the Minister of Education, Joe McHugh, to look at their situation and come up with a solution.

Some solutions suggested by the 5th year Instagram campaign, 5thyearsnotforgotten, include:

It has also been suggested that oral exams could be cancelled. However, Aoife Devlin, a 17 year old student from Sligo, has argued that cancelling the orals could have a negative impact on students who perform better in oral or practical exams than they do in written exams, putting more pressure on them in the Summer.

5th year students on the COVID-19 pandemic

Below are some of the responses we received from 5th year students on how they have been impacted by the pandemic:

Ríona Nolan, 17, Co.Carlow

Although I am delighted that the LC got cancelled for current 6th years, I believe the government now needs to look at 5th year’s situation and how they can make the LC as accommodating as possible for us. 5th years across the country are all at different levels with online learning right now. The government needs to be in touch with all schools about how we can all sit the best Leaving Cert possible, considering the situation. Whether this be reducing our course work, or making the exams slightly easier. We have been impacted by this just as much as 6th years, and if nothing is done thousands of us will be suffering this time next year.

Roksana Segiet, 17, Co. Carlow

Online learning definitely has its disadvantages. Unfortunately, we are all behind in most of our subjects and next year, it’s going to be hard to find the time for extra classes, homework, study etc. I think that while educators are trying their best to reassure us that everything will be taken into account, it would be nice to get some kind of clarification from the government. I’m happy that 6th years were listened to and that their opinions were taken into consideration, and I really hope that 5th years will also be heard.

Adam Lambe, 17, Monaghan

Without the classroom environment and the style of teaching that I’ve evolved to learn best from for 17 years, I find it harder to learn than ever before. Because self directed learning is quite new to me, I am not producing the same quality of work. With all that said, the lack of productivity is also affecting my mental health as I feel constantly stressed and anxious about my education. Without clarity and hopefully accommodations from the department of education on the LC 2021, students like me will feel this heightened stress and anxiety and lessened productivity indefinitely!

Want to share your experience as a college student during the COVID-19 pandemic? Write about it for SpunOut.ie.

Feeling overwhelmed or anxious around the current pandemic?

The National Youth Council of Ireland, together with the Department of Foreign Affairs and Trade, have announce the call for applications for the United Nations Youth Delegate Programme for Ireland 2020 – 2021 which will support two young people aged between 18-25 years to join Ireland’s delegation to the United Nations.

Apply for the UN Youth Delegate Programme for Ireland 2020-2021 

Since 2015, the Department of Foreign Affairs and Trade and the National Youth Council of Ireland (NYCI) have partnered to provide the opportunity for young people in Ireland to participate in the UN Youth Delegate Programme.

The aims of the United Nations Youth Delegation Programme Ireland are: 

Sign up to The Year in Review

If you are interested in the UN Delegate Programme, or thinking of applying, sign up for Thursday’s live event “The Year in Review”- UN Youth Delegate Programme Ireland hosted by the current Irish UN delegates Jack O’Connor and Valery Molay. This event will give you the inside track on what being a UN Youth Delegate actually means, and how the UN system works.

As a young person, hearing the suggestion that the Department of Children & Youth Affairs (DCYA) may be abolished by the next government was incredibly disappointing to hear. SpunOut.ie, as well as sixty other children and youth organisations have called for the retention of the department. I think many young people are angry about this proposal and have expressed disappointment that this decision is even being considered, with many giving reasons why the department should be kept. Here are some of the reasons I think it should be kept.

1. Young people need representation at government level

When the department was established in 2011, it meant the youth work and youth-focused Non-Governmental Organisations (NGOs) had a department dedicated to the lives of young people and their needs. It meant that young people’s voices could be represented in government. It also held the government accountable for improving youth services. It crucially showed that the state valued young people and what they bring to the nation now and as the next generation.

This allowed young people, who may have felt that they had no space for their voices to be heard, to have a department where they can directly highlight what issues they may have, what’s important to them, and how government changes can help better the lives of young people.

It also meant that at cabinet-level, where important decisions are made which affect young people’s lives, their voice can be heard to ensure that their future is not negatively affected by changes which they would have no say in.

2. The consequences if the department was abolished

If the DCYA was to be abolished, it could mean that the department’s responsibilities are split among the other departments. If that was the case, I think this would mean that getting funding could be more difficult, as it would be from different departments and likely to be different ways of applying.

I think it would also lose the youth voice, as the other departments may prioritise other areas economically rather than give youth issues specific importance, or would only be a minor part of their work, as an afterthought rather than priority.

3. #YouthWorkChangesLives

Youth work has opened up new possibilities that I would not have even dreamed about two years ago. Ever since going to my first Young Voices meeting in August 2018, I have been a part of many incredible organisations that value young people’s voices and elevate them to ensure they can be heard by politicians.

It is through youth work that I’ve gotten new confidence and can call for change on behalf of others. I can help to empower other young people to reach their full potential and become active Irish, European and global citizens.

4. More important than ever to keep

With issues such as the Leaving Certificate, climate change and COVID-19 being hot topics in discussion, these are all issues that young people want to have their voice heard on. The DCYA’s latest initiative of a Youth Climate Justice Fund may not have been possible under any other department. For such an important issue, DCYA is vital to ensure money can go to youth groups and movements that call for climate justice and awareness of climate change locally and nationally.

What can be done

Let your TDs know that you want the department to stay by phoning them or sending them an email saying why you want it kept. If you are unsure who your TD is, check whoismytd.com which will tell you who they are and how to contact them.

A petition has also been started to ensure the DCYA is retained, which can be found here. Please feel free to share it with friends and family to get more signatures. It is crucial the DCYA is retained, and doing small actions like that can be a major part in ensuring it is kept.

Before I joined a political party I had very little knowledge about what was going on in Ireland. I could barely name the parties or tell you who was in government. Although I was interested, I didn’t engage at all and not having any knowledge or opinions prevented me from getting involved in conversations. Around this time last year during the local elections, I was working in my shop when my local councillor came in after canvassing in the area. A few days later we went for a coffee together and she took the time to tell me all about how she got involved and how I could as well. I felt both inspired by the positive change she had made over the years and empowered to start making a difference myself.

What does being a political party member mean?

To become a member of a political party is simple. You go on the party’s website and sign up which involves a fee of around ten euro. From there you should receive newsletters from the party that will let you know what your representatives are getting up to and what position they are holding on certain issues. This could be anything from Housing to Health. You should also receive invitations coming up to meetings in your constituency where you can meet other members and have a say in what needs to happen in your area.

If you’re under the age of 30 you automatically join the youth wing of the party. Getting involved in this is a great opportunity to meet people around your age who have similar political interests. We too have our own meetings in our constituencies every few weeks to discuss what the party is doing and the kind of things we want to do in our area. This could involve lobbying our councillors on certain issues to be pushed such as littering, housing prices, sustainability or educating people on their rights. It’s a place where you can share your ideas and work on a plan to make change happen in your community.

Learning as you go

It’s amazing the amount of things you can pick up on by getting involved. Getting to canvas for the local and general elections you immediately learn more about the candidates, their manifestos and therefore their party. Getting out of your comfort zone to knock on a stranger’s door and ask them to vote for someone is quite frightening at first but I have gotten more confident because of it. It’s also an opportunity to get closer to people in your area and learn about what their values are and what they would want to see happening. A couple years ago I would be anxious opening my door to councillors or TDs but now I would be eager to chat with them.

Feeling empowered

When it comes to elections or issues going on in Ireland or the rest of the world, I feel empowered by the experiences I have had in this party to start discussions and learn even more about what others think. If my councillor had not reached out to me I don’t know where I would be now. It’s important to me that I facilitate these discussions to let people know their voices can be heard from not only the sidelines but also from within the parties themselves.

If you think something should change or happen in your area you can email your local representative and they should solve it. Being in a party means you have people to back you up and help you in making this change.

If you want to get involved, learn more, make a difference and make friends for life, consider joining a political party.

In March of this year, colleges were closed down with little notice as part of the COVID-19/coronavirus restrictions. The last few weeks and months have been disruptive for college students with uncertainty around course work, exams, placements, grades and supports. While some colleges are providing online classes and additional support, others are not. Some college students are managing the changes well, while others are struggling.

SpunOut.ie wants to share your COVID-19 experience, to support other young people across Ireland.

Share your story 

Here are some suggestions to get you started:

We believe that young people across Ireland can help support each other by sharing stories, lived experiences, advice and opinions. If you’re between 16 and 25 years old and living in Ireland, we’d love to hear from you if you’re interested in writing an article or making a video.

Do I need writing experience?

You do not need any writing experience. We’ll help you out every step of the way giving you feedback and suggestions for your piece. Your piece will be posted on SpunOut.ie and our social media so that thousands of young people across Ireland will feel more supported and encouraged to seek help.

Read other articles on COVID-19

How do I get started? 

If you’re interested in sharing your story, get in touch with [email protected]

In March of this year, schools were closed as part of the COVID-19/coronavirus restrictions. Over the last few weeks, many students have studying from home, trying to cover the courses themselves and prepare for exams. This has been difficult for many people, especially students who may not have a proper space to study, need extra support, or have other responsibilities at home. For students doing their Leaving Cert, the uncertainty around the exams may have been stressful. For students in other years, many are thinking about how the changes will impact them going forward. 

SpunOut.ie wants to share your COVID-19 experience, to support other young people across Ireland.

Share your story 

Here are some suggestions to get you started:

We believe that young people across Ireland can help support each other by sharing stories, lived experiences, advice and opinions. If you’re between 16 and 25 years old and living in Ireland, we’d love to hear from you if you’re interested in writing an article or making a video.

Do I need writing experience?

You do not need any writing experience. We’ll help you out every step of the way giving you feedback and suggestions for your piece. Your piece will be posted on SpunOut.ie and our social media so that thousands of young people across Ireland will feel more supported and encouraged to seek help.

Read other articles on COVID-19

 

Email [email protected] to share your story

 

 

The Department of Education has said that Leaving Cert students are no longer allowed to receive teaching instruction from their teachers, or to contact them to discuss their grades or class ranking. All Leaving Cert classes officially ended on the 11th of May and from then on students who try to contact their teachers to discuss their grades will be viewed as “canvassing”, which means trying to influence the grade they will receive from their teacher.

The Department ban Leaving Cert students from contacting teachers

In a statement, the Department said: “No additional work will be accepted from students from this date. Teachers and students may not discuss the student’s achievement in the subject over the past two years. Nor can they discuss the student’s ranking in a class, or their estimated mark or the level at which an estimated mark is to be provided in a subject.”

The Department also said that Leaving Cert students continue to be students of their schools until the end of term and their “wellbeing should be supported in line with department guidelines on the role of the student support team.”

What happens if a student is accused of canvassing?

Department officials are currently working on a system to deal with any reports of canvassing from students or parents. If any canvassing takes place the rules are likely to state that the canvassing must be formally recorded by the school and then reported to the Department of Education. The Department said that detailed guidance for teachers and principals is being developed on this topic and will be available soon.

Have teachers begun the grading process?

Teachers are currently being told that they must wait until they have received training and guidance from the Department before starting any work on the calculated grading process. The Department said training and detailed guidance will be available “shortly.” The Teachers’ unions have been told grading will take place over a number of weeks and is likely to be completed in late May or June. The Government hopes to be able to give final grades to students in August, similar to the normal results timetable.

Poet Stephen James Smith and director Craig Kenny have teamed up with First Fortnight and written and filmed a poem to mark the particular disruption in the nations mental health that COVID-19 has created. Collectively Counting is a call for us all to pause for a moment and count together the many questions and wanderings that this time has brought to us. The video was created with the support of the HSE National Office of Suicide Prevention (NOSP), as part of Connecting for Life, Ireland’s Strategy to Reduce Suicide.

Collectively Counting 

Speaking about the creation of the poem poet Stephen James Smith said ‘As Seamus Heaney said; “I can’t think of a case where poems changed the world, but what they do is they change people’s understanding of what’s going on in the world”. Right now, there’s so much uncertainty and it’s the poet’s responsibility to ask questions, even if they remain unanswered, it can help us to try and find meaning in the eye of a storm. This is my attempt at finding some meaning.’

First Fortnight wanted to get this work out now despite it being many months until their usual festival time in January. Commenting on the collaboration First Fortnight said “How we are organised as a society affects our mental health in positive and negative ways. Right now, we are disrupted and the consequence of that disruption is we are separated from each other. We wanted to create a moment for us all to come together to pause and reflect; Stephen’s poem gives us an opportunity to take that moment.”

About First Fortnight

First Fortnight is an arts-based mental health charity and holds a festival every January aimed at ending stigma surrounding mental health. The charity helped found the European Arts Festival model and stage Europe’s first mental health arts festival in Athens, Greece in 2016.  After that, First Fortnight hosted the European Mental Health Arts Festival in communities across Ireland in 2019. 

First Fortnight believe that an awareness campaign beginning in the First Fortnight of the year works well because we are all a little raw this time of year and more likely to be open to a caring response to mental health issues. First Fortnight has become a regular event in the cultural calendar for mental health awareness, challenging prejudice and ending stigma through cultural action. First Fortnight also run a Centre for Creative Therapies, which provides a free creative psychotherapy service to vulnerable children, young adults and adults experiencing or at risk of homelessness.

Find out more about First Fortnight. 

When I started acting, I half-knew long distance relationships would become part of my life. Since then, I’ve learned some things about managing challenges that come with months spent apart from your special someone. But now, like many others, I’m facing new challenges with love during the lockdown.

My boyfriend and I met while working on a cruise ship. He’s from the US, so we knew long-distance was looming. We just didn’t know it would happen so fast, and in this way. Abruptly, our contracts were paused and we were sent home – thrust from our idyllic routine, thousands of miles away and five hours apart. Today, couples in a similar position may never have dreamed they wouldn’t be physically together. Many of us are staying with parents, relatives or friends. You may even live close to your partner, but the COVID-19 restrictions are keeping you apart – so you might as well be on separate continents.

In light of this, here are some thoughts to help you both get through this weird time, and come out stronger than ever.

New conversations and new silences

Ordinarily, you have a job to do, hobbies to entertain you, friends to socialise with. Lockdown strips you of all those things – stealing your sense of purpose, security, and whatever else you gleaned from normal life. More crippling for your relationship …there’s nothing to talk about! My boyfriend and I find this really hard. We’re feeling inadequate and uninteresting, like we have nothing to offer. It doesn’t feel good when someone asks ‘how’s your day?’ and your answer lasts ten seconds. I find I get more and more nervous, wracking my brains for some news to tell, and come up with zero.

That’s okay. Forgive yourself for not having an exciting life right now. Forgive them too. Don’t fear those conversation gaps – embrace them. They could be a gateway for new discussions or a different kind of connection. If your relationship is healthy, it can be enough that they’re willing to spend time with you, in whatever capacity they can – and vice versa. Use it as an opportunity to find new things to do together. Watch movies or a TV series, read Dad jokes, reminisce your happy memories, brainstorm plans for when this is over. It’s cheesy, but sometimes it’s enough for me just to have my man on the phone while I’m falling asleep. Let’s not underestimate the power of a simple good morning/goodnight text, or bouncing GIFs back and forth – just to make each other smile.

Remember, you probably wouldn’t feel the same pressure to be fun and interesting all the time if you were physically together. So why feel it now?

Dealing with uncertainty

For me, it’s important to have the next visit planned pretty much as soon as the last visit ends. Dated, in the diary and booked. Through the long months of missing your person, it’s comforting to know when you’ll have them in your arms again. But that kind of planning just got thrown out the window, and that’s stressful. Will it be weeks? Months? Longer? It’s precious knowledge that I took for granted before all of this. Like running a race without knowing how many laps are required to win – not impossible, but more difficult.

So how do you deal with that? I ask myself that question daily. What helps me, , is just to admit that it’s pretty sad. Allow it to yourselves. You have permission to feel sad about it. I’d even say it’s necessary. Naming and acknowledging it helps you know it, and hopefully shrink it. Find the balance between not dwelling on the negatives, and talking each other through it. Say ‘I miss you’, and ‘this is hard’ as many times as necessary. Be caring with how you communicate these feelings. Make sure they know you’re not saying ‘this isn’t good enough for me’ and vice versa. Everyone’s understandably sensitive and vulnerable right now. We must be gentle with each other. Be honest, be clear, be there, and I hope the weight you’re bearing lightens.

Relying on yourself

This crisis presents us with a huge void of time on our hands, and plenty of options like despair, anxiety, grief, frustration, fear, and good old boredom to fill it with. I think humans feel the need to fill that void, and you may unintentionally be filling it with destructive behaviours in your relationship.

One or both of you could be expecting the other to fill it. This can cause disappointment if you fail to heal each other’s uncomfortable lockdown feelings. You may feel ‘needier’ than before or feel more hurt when they don’t text back immediately, or not quite ready to hang up the phone, even though it’s 3am and you’ve talked for hours. You might look forward to your FaceTime all day, and be sad if you don’t feel better when it’s over. You may even blame your person for those feelings, or argue a little …a lot… more than usual.

I think the trick is to find things to do that make you feel grounded, and rely on yourself to do them. This gives you power to make yourself feel okay. Of course you and your person can lean on each other for support, but maybe you don’t have to rely solely on them. Whether it’s painting, clearing the attic, talking to friends, try to do three of them a day. I think you’ll feel in better control, and be able to lift much of the responsibility off your person. This works both ways! You’re not responsible for constantly making them feel better either.

Issues in your relationship

If you’re arguing often, ask yourself why? Both parties should look in the mirror and ask honestly if it’s them or their circumstances talking. Are you picking fights out of boredom? Frustration? Are you subconsciously testing them to see if they’ll decide it’s not worth it? Or is there genuinely something about the relationship you’d like to adjust. If so, discuss it calmly. Maybe that’s a good thing. Maybe lockdown is giving you a clearer insight into issues you didn’t know you had.

The COVID-19 restrictions, for all its negatives, could be helping you identify how to work on those issues. Whether that spells the making or breaking of your relationship, discovering those things can only be good.

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