How to cope with suicidal thoughts in the long term

If you’re struggling with suicidal thoughts, you’re not alone, and it’s important to know that help is available. Suicidal thoughts and the feelings that accompany them can be overwhelming, but they are not a reflection of who you are or what your future holds. This factsheet aims to help you make sense of what you’re going through, offer ways to cope, and encourage you to reach out for support when needed.

If you or someone you’re supporting is in immediate danger, call an ambulance on 999. If you require urgent listening support, free-text HELLO to 50808 to chat anonymously with a trained volunteer from Text About It (our 24-7 messaging support service). Alternatively, Pieta runs a free, 24 hour helpline for people who are feeling suicidal and engaging in self harm. Call 1800 247 247 or text ‘Help’ to 51444 to get started (standard text messaging rates apply).

How to cope in the long term

Protecting your overall wellbeing is key to reducing the risk of suicidal thoughts or behaviours in the future. Here you will find strategies to help you cope in the long term, including how to manage intense emotions, change certain thought patterns, build resilience, and find deeper meaning in your life over time. You’ll also learn how to strengthen your connections with others and form new, supportive relationships.

If you need guidance on how to deal with suicidal thoughts in the moment, take a look at our factsheet on how to cope with suicidal thoughts right now.

In this factsheet, you will learn how you can improve your overall wellbeing in the long term and reduce your risk of experiencing suicidal thoughts by:

Making a safety plan
Learning to manage difficult feelings
Identifying and change problematic thought patterns
Building coping skills
Strengthening your relationships
Prioritising what matters most
Taking care of your physical health
Managing the build up of life stress
Building your self-esteem

Make a safety plan

A safety plan is a personalised guide designed to help you when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts or high levels of emotional distress. It is best to make your safety plan in collaboration with a mental health professional. It includes guidance on how to make your environment safe, a list of emergency contacts, and coping strategies that have worked for you when feeling distressed or suicidal in the past.

While a safety plan is an important tool that can provide immediate support, it is not a replacement for in-person professional support. Face-to-face counselling or psychotherapy is often an essential part of a person’s overall recovery or treatment plan when they are experiencing long-term mental health difficulties. Talk therapy can help you identify the underlying causes of your ongoing distress and provide a safe, confidential space for you to explore long-term strategies for managing your distress.

If you want to learn more about drawing up your own personal safety plan, take a look at our factsheet on how to create a safety plan.

Learn to manage difficult feelings

Emotional regulation is the ability to manage and respond to your feelings in a constructive way. It involves learning to recognise your emotions and make sense of them in a way that does not harm yourself or others. Developing this skill is important because it empowers you to make thoughtful choices about what actions to take when faced with difficult situations, rather than reacting on impulse or trying to avoid the challenge due to fear.

While you can’t always avoid feeling overwhelmed, emotional regulation can give you the skills to navigate intense feelings (or lack of feeling), which increases the likelihood of making decisions that support your overall wellbeing. Emotional regulation can look like pausing and reflecting before responding, acknowledging and accepting your feelings without judgement, and tackling the root cause of your distress, where possible.

Find out more about how to regulate your emotions.

Identify and change problematic thought patterns

Cognitive reframing is a way to change how you think about or view a situation, especially when your initial thoughts are unhelpful or unbalanced. The way we think about events has a big impact on how we feel and behave. If we are more inclined to see things in a negative light, we might begin to feel stuck, hopeless, or anxious. Reframing helps us break out of this cycle by challenging these problematic thought patterns and replacing them with more balanced, less biased thoughts and judgements.

Cognitive reframing is not about ignoring or dismissing difficult emotions or stressful situations. Instead, it involves approaching them with a more flexible attitude, allowing you to explore different interpretations or perspectives. This approach helps you cope better by finding views of the situation that are more grounded in reality, rather than being driven solely by your fears or anxieties.

Cognitive reframing

You can learn to practise basic cognitive reframing by taking the following steps:

1. Identify the thought: Start by noticing when you’re having a catastrophic or biased thought. For example, after doing poorly on an exam, you might catch yourself thinking, “I always fail, nothing ever goes right for me”
2. Examine the thought: Ask yourself if this thought is really true or if it’s an exaggeration of the reality. Is it based on facts, or could there be another way to look at the situation? In the example above, you might realise that while some things haven’t gone the way you hoped, saying “always” is an overgeneralisation. An overgeneralisation is when you take one example, like doing poorly on one exam, and assume it will apply to all future situations, like believing you’ll always do poorly on exams
3. Reframe the thought: Once you’ve challenged the original thought, try to reframe it in a more balanced or constructive way. Instead of “I always fail,” you might say, “I’ve faced some challenges, but I’ve also succeeded at other things, and I can keep improving.” This new thought still acknowledges the difficulty but gives you a sense of purpose and possibility

Find out more about how to change biased thought patterns.

Build coping skills

Coping mechanisms or strategies refer to thoughts or behaviours that a person uses to manage internal or external sources of stress or distress. There are multiple different types of coping strategies, and some of these are more helpful and supportive of a person’s long-term wellbeing than others. Find out more about how to build new coping skills.

Coping strategies that may relieve stress and anxiety in the short term but often lead to long-term negative effects include habits like:

• Substance misuse: using alcohol or drugs to escape anxiety, stress or the effects of trauma
• Avoidance: putting off dealing with difficult situations, emotions, and/or conflicts
• Disordered eating patterns: using one’s relationship with food as a way to escape difficult emotions or manage stress

Building non-harmful and effective coping strategies are one way of improving your emotional and psychological wellbeing and minimising your risk of having suicidal thoughts. In fact, helpful coping strategies make up an important part of any safety plan.

Examples of some helpful long-term coping strategies include:

• Problem-solving: Breaking tasks or core challenges into smaller steps and creating a plan for yourself can be beneficial. You might practise this by setting clear, achievable goals and working through them methodically
• Seeking support: Sharing thoughts and experiences with trusted friends, family members or a counsellor or psychotherapist, who can help you gain perspective on your challenges and work towards creating meaningful change
• Mindfulness and relaxation: Incorporating mindfulness-based techniques or other soothing activities into your daily or weekly routine makes accessing a state of calm easier when setbacks or challenges arise

Strengthen your relationships

Creating a support network can take time, but it’s a valuable investment, particularly during periods of mental health challenges or distress. Everyone has different needs when it comes to social support. Some people thrive with a large network of friends, while others feel content with a few close connections. Similarly, individuals have varied preferences for interacting and forming friendships; some may find online interactions more comfortable, while others prefer interacting face-to-face.

Online communities can offer support and opportunities to connect over shared interests, especially for those who might feel isolated due to geographical location, communication and sensory processing differences, mental health difficulties, or physical challenges. However, when possible, spending time with others in person can greatly enhance your overall sense of wellbeing, especially when these interactions happen in a supportive environment where individual differences are respected.

Prioritise what matters most

Discovering what truly matters to you and pursuing meaningful projects can bring a greater sense of purpose and fulfilment. While not everyone has the opportunity to make a career out of their passions, it’s often possible to incorporate meaningful activities into your life outside of work. Some examples of how you might do this include:

• Volunteer work: Find a cause you’re passionate about and volunteer your time. This can connect you with others who share your values
• Hobbies or passion projects: Invest in the activities you love, whether it’s painting, gardening, or playing a musical instrument. These activities can be a source of joy, personal expression, and connection with others
• Quality time: Spend time with loved ones, engaging in activities that strengthen your relationships and bring you a sense of satisfaction

Take care of your physical health

Taking care of your physical health consistently is crucial because it directly impacts your emotional and psychological wellbeing. Prioritising regular exercise or movement, eating a balanced diet, staying hydrated and getting sufficient sleep, where possible, can improve your quality of life in the long term.

Minding your physical health is one way to practise regular self-care. Read more about how to practise self-care in multiple areas of your life.

Manage the build-up of life stress

Most of us face a variety of different stressors or sources of stress every day. Everyday stressors can include balancing work and personal life, managing deadlines, dealing with financial pressures, and handling family responsibilities. While each stressor might seem minor on its own, the cumulative effect of multiple stressors over time can overwhelm a person’s ability to cope, especially if they have a history of trauma, or are living in difficult circumstances.

Learning to tackle everyday challenges when they arise rather than avoiding them or procrastinating can help prevent a build-up of stress that can lead to feelings of hopelessness and a loss of control. Building resilience and developing helpful coping strategies can improve your ability to respond to stressors that lie outside of your control, such as job loss, housing insecurity, or discrimination.

In today’s culture where productivity and high achievement are often celebrated, managing everyday stress also involves paying attention to workplace wellbeing. Minding your mental health at work involves setting boundaries, taking regular breaks, and requesting “reasonable accommodations” if you are struggling to meet the demands of work due to long-term mental health difficulties or a physical disability. Reasonable accommodations at work are changes like adjusted work hours, modified job duties, or special equipment that help employees with disabilities perform their tasks with greater ease and effectiveness.

For more information on workplace wellbeing, take a look at our factsheet on managing stress and preventing burnout. You can also find guidance on how to talk to your employer about your mental health.

Build your self-esteem

Self-esteem describes how you perceive and value yourself. Building self-esteem is important for your overall wellbeing because it affects how you deal with challenges, interact with others, and make decisions. Developing a more positive self-image can reduce feelings of hopelessness and lower the risk of suicidal thoughts. When you feel good about yourself and believe in your worth, you’re more likely to seek support, engage in healthy behaviours, and maintain a balanced perspective on life. Read more about how to improve your self-esteem.

Get professional help

While developing your own coping strategies can be helpful, there is no shame in reaching out for support. You don’t need to go through this alone.

If you feel the need for guidance and professional support, consider talking to your GP about your mental health. Help is available from various support services around Ireland. Below are some immediate support options:

• Pieta offer in-person suicide and self harm support services in centres around Ireland and a 24-hour helpline. Call 1800 247 247 to talk to someone about what’s going on and get support
• SOSAD Ireland works to raise awareness and help prevent suicide in Ireland. SOSAD offer supports for people who are struggling with suicidal ideation through a free counselling service to those over 16 years of age. They also have a 24/7 helpline on 1800 901 909
• Listening support: If you need to talk to someone now you can call Pieta at 1800 247 247 or Samaritans at 116 123

Traveller Counselling Service

If you are a young Traveller and would like to speak to a counsellor who directly works with the Travelling community, the Travelling Counselling Service can support you. The service works from a culturally inclusive framework which respects Traveller culture, identity, values and norms and works from a perspective of culture centred counselling and psychotherapy. They offer counselling both in person and online:

• Landline: 01 868 5761
• Mobile: 086 308 1476
• Email: [email protected]

Feeling overwhelmed and want to talk to someone?

• Get anonymous support 24/7 with our text message support service
• Connect with a trained volunteer who will listen to you, and help you to move forward feeling better
• Free-text SPUNOUT to 50808 to begin
• Find out more about our text message support service

If you are a customer of the 48 or An Post network or cannot get through using the ‘50808’ short code please text HELLO to 086 1800 280 (standard message rates may apply). Some smaller networks do not support short codes like ‘50808’.